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Ephesians 6:1-4
! Introduction
I was nineteen years old when my father passed away, but in the short time that I had him, we shared some very special times.
I was the oldest grandchild on both sides of the family and so when I was old enough, I was the first one permitted to go along on fishing trips with my dad and his friends and relatives.
I still remember when I was eighteen we went hunting deer with some of his friends.
We were walking back from the bush in the evening and I put my arm around my dad, and we wrestled a little bit.
There was a growing camaraderie that I remember as very special.
There are other memories as well - memories of things I learned from my dad.
I remember when I was purchasing my second vehicle.
He came for a test drive with me and advised that I should probably not buy it.
I was so anxious to have wheels that I bought it anyway and later I was sorry because it was a lemon and I had nothing but trouble with it.
I learned from that experience to be much more cautious in making purchases and not to be so anxious to get what I wanted.
We spent a lot of hours working together when for several summers I worked part time for him in our photo studio.
He would expose the negatives on the enlarger and I would move them from tray to tray in the developing chemicals.
As we worked in the yellow light of the dark room, it made for lots of talking time and he had a significant influence on my life in all of these times.
I did not have my dad very long and so I do not know much about being a son, but I have sure enjoyed the relationship I have as a father with my children.
I have had a longer relationship with them than I had with my dad and each year I enjoy it more.
We enjoy recreation together, have good spiritual talks and it is a blessing.
I am thankful for what I have experienced.
The relationship between parents and children can be a blessing, but it can also be very difficult.
I am so sad when I hear about fathers who are absent from the life of their children and when I hear about fathers who physically, emotionally or verbally abuse their children.
Sometimes children rebel against their parents and the relationship is broken in that way.
These situations produce a lot of pain and are not what God intends for the parent~/child relationship.
Today is Father’s day and it provides us a good opportunity to think about God’s plan for the relationship between fathers and children.
How can we build families that bring a blessing?
The text which will help us think this through is Ephesians 6:1-4.
It is a classic passage on parenting and deals with both sides of the relationship.
As we examine this passage, we need to remember the context in which it is written.
As you turn to Ephesians 6, please note first of all that the context of the passage begins in Ephesians 5:1 where we are called to be imitators of God.
This passage gives us some practical aspects of that imitation.
These verses are also in the context of Ephesians 5:21 in which we are called to be subject to one another.
Just as the husband~/wife relationship is described in the context of mutual submission, that same context pertains to the parent~/child relationship.
Both need to respect and love each other.
So what are the specifics of mutual submission in the relationship between a father and his children?
What does it mean to imitate God as Fathers?
As children?
Let us read and then examine Ephesians 6:1-4.
!
I. Children, Obey
To begin with, I would like to invite all the children to come to the front.
I have a story for you.
Peter and his friends met at the usual place after supper.
They were in the same grade in the same school and were best friends.
They had met in the empty field many times.
It was a great place to play.
There was a large grassy area and it was surrounded by trees.
Some great adventure always happened when they got together.
Sometimes they pretended to be bushmen as they snuck around in the trees at the edge of the field.
Sometimes they gathered scraps of wood and made a fort and sometimes they played soccer or baseball in the open area.
Ryan was the last one to get there, and so Jim and Kyle and Peter had been sitting in the shade of the tree talking together.
Jim was complaining because he couldn’t play very long.
His mother had told him that he had to come home at 7:00 so that he could spend some time studying for the test that he was going to have in school the next day.
His mother had insisted that he must come home and study and although he really didn’t want to, he reluctantly knew that he would go home.
He would obey his mother, but he would stretch out his play time as long as he possibly could, maybe even arrive home at a few minutes after 7:00.
Kyle also had to study some more for the same test.
Although his parents hadn’t told him when he was supposed to be home, he wanted to go and study.
It wasn’t that he was a keener or that he cared that much about his grades, in fact, they were just average.
The reason he wanted to go and study was because his mother had promised him a new video game if he did well on the test and so he wanted to go and cram as much as possible.
Just then Ryan showed up and caught the end of the conversation.
The reason he was late was because he had just heard a big lecture from his father.
His last test had not been very good and his father had threatened that if he would not do better, he would be punished.
He was supposed to go tell his friends that he couldn’t play and had to go right back home to study.
He was angry, but he also didn’t want to be punished more, so he stayed around for a little while and then went back home.
Peter listened to his friends talking about the test and their reasons for obeying their parents.
His father had asked him when he was going to study and Peter had told him that he would go out to play for a little while and then come home.
Peter was a Christian and wanted to do what was right.
He respected his parents and knew that they wanted the best for him.
He knew that he needed to do a little more work to prepare for the test but it was good just to get a little fresh air and take his mind off it for awhile.
Then, he would return home and study for the rest of the evening.
Did all these boys obey their parents?
They did, but their obedience was different wasn’t it.
Jim obeyed, but he was reluctant to do so.
He didn’t understand his parents rules or why there had to be rules.
Willie obeyed, but only because there was something in it for him.
He was going to get a video game and that is why he obeyed.
Ryan obeyed as well, but his heart wasn’t in it.
He was angry and only obeyed because he didn’t want to be punished.
Only Peter obeyed because he knew that his parents loved him and wanted the best for him.
He obeyed willingly because he knew it was best.
The Bible says, “Children obey your parents in the Lord.”
This means that you as children should obey your parents.
But it isn’t only important to obey your parents, it is also important why you obey your parents.
You need to obey your parents because you are a Christian and because you trust them and know they want what is best for you.
Do you think that you can learn to obey like that?
I would like to pray that God will help you to do so.
!
II.
Children, Honor
!! A. Honor
As we examine this text, we come across another word to children.
I believe that the call to obedience is written to younger children.
The wonderful thing about Christianity is that it includes children.
God cares about children and by giving them a word to follow includes them in the household of faith.
But when you move out of the house and are an adult, I do not believe that obedience is really the word that pertains in your relationship.
But that does not mean that there isn’t a word for adult children.
For all children, regardless of age, the word of God is to “Honour your parents.”
What does it mean to honour your parents?
The root of the Greek word is “worth,” “evaluation,” “honor,” and “price.”
When I was young, I remember well the baseball cards that were printed at that time.
I didn’t buy them much because I didn’t care about collecting pictures of all the players.
In fact, I remember buying the cards, giving the card away and enjoying the gum.
The gum wasn’t that great and so I usually bought other gum.
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