Advice #52

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ADVICE DAD NEVER GAVE YOU

Ralph Sorter

   Lost & Found!  You wouldn’t normally expect to find a marriage in that section of the department store…but it can happen in the home.

   Love in a marriage can be lost via a number of reasons: neglect, pressures, business obligations, etc.  Even just the passing of time can erode away the feelings of love.  But don’t think it unusual that you find the feelings of love fluctuate.  It happens in all marriages.  It’s what you do with it that determines whether the marriage gets salvaged or scrapped.

   Just because the feeling is gone doesn’t make the truth change.  The truth is that you have a marriage that is honored and blessed in the eyes of God.  The truth is that the love is there even though the feelings skirt here and there like a puff of cotton being tossed by a kitten.  The problem comes when you focus on the feelings rather than the truth.

   I want to challenge you to take a new view of the order of your life using the model of a train.  This train has 4 cars: an engine, a coal car, a passenger car, and a caboose.  We all know they belong in that order.  Label the engine “truth.  Label the coal car “faith.”  Label the passenger car “circumstances”.  And label the caboose “feelings.”  Beginning to get the picture?  Truth is the driving force, fueled by faith.  Feelings vary with the circumstances of life.  But if we are setting our internal compass according to our feelings, it’s no wonder the marriage gets scrapped in the Lost & Found department.  Truth needs to be our magnetic North, not feelings, not circumstances…not anything else.

   So go back to the switchyard and put your train back together the way it works best.  Put the truth before the feeling and restore the love.  You can find it again!  I did.

A Message from HOPE’S

Marriage and Family Ministry

ADVICE DAD NEVER GAVE YOU

Ralph Sorter

   Lost & Found!  You wouldn’t normally expect to find a marriage in that section of the department store…but it can happen in the home.

   Love in a marriage can be lost via a number of reasons: neglect, pressures, business obligations, etc.  Even just the passing of time can erode away the feelings of love.  But don’t think it unusual that you find the feelings of love fluctuate.  It happens in all marriages.  It’s what you do with it that determines whether the marriage gets salvaged or scrapped.

   Just because the feeling is gone doesn’t make the truth change.  The truth is that you have a marriage that is honored and blessed in the eyes of God.  The truth is that the love is there even though the feelings skirt here and there like a puff of cotton being tossed by a kitten.  The problem comes when you focus on the feelings rather than the truth.

   I want to challenge you to take a new view of the order of your life using the model of a train.  This train has 4 cars: an engine, a coal car, a passenger car, and a caboose.  We all know they belong in that order.  Label the engine “truth.  Label the coal car “faith.”  Label the passenger car “circumstances”.  And label the caboose “feelings.”  Beginning to get the picture?  Truth is the driving force, fueled by faith.  Feelings vary with the circumstances of life.  But if we are setting our internal compass according to our feelings, it’s no wonder the marriage gets scrapped in the Lost & Found department.  Truth needs to be our magnetic North, not feelings, not circumstances…not anything else.

   So go back to the switchyard and put your train back together the way it works best.  Put the truth before the feeling and restore the love.  You can find it again!  I did.

A Message from HOPE’S

Marriage and Family Ministry

ADVICE DAD NEVER GAVE YOU

Ralph Sorter

   Lost & Found!  You wouldn’t normally expect to find a marriage in that section of the department store…but it can happen in the home.

   Love in a marriage can be lost via a number of reasons: neglect, pressures, business obligations, etc.  Even just the passing of time can erode away the feelings of love.  But don’t think it unusual that you find the feelings of love fluctuate.  It happens in all marriages.  It’s what you do with it that determines whether the marriage gets salvaged or scrapped.

   Just because the feeling is gone doesn’t make the truth change.  The truth is that you have a marriage that is honored and blessed in the eyes of God.  The truth is that the love is there even though the feelings skirt here and there like a puff of cotton being tossed by a kitten.  The problem comes when you focus on the feelings rather than the truth.

   I want to challenge you to take a new view of the order of your life using the model of a train.  This train has 4 cars: an engine, a coal car, a passenger car, and a caboose.  We all know they belong in that order.  Label the engine “truth.  Label the coal car “faith.”  Label the passenger car “circumstances”.  And label the caboose “feelings.”  Beginning to get the picture?  Truth is the driving force, fueled by faith.  Feelings vary with the circumstances of life.  But if we are setting our internal compass according to our feelings, it’s no wonder the marriage gets scrapped in the Lost & Found department.  Truth needs to be our magnetic North, not feelings, not circumstances…not anything else.

   So go back to the switchyard and put your train back together the way it works best.  Put the truth before the feeling and restore the love.  You can find it again!  I did.

A Message from HOPE’S

Marriage and Family Ministry

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