PILGRIMS AND THEIR ROLES

Alan Pihringer

Progressing as Pilgrims • Sermon • Submitted a year ago • Presented a year ago

1 Peter 3:1–7

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Notes

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Introduction

-{1 Peter 3}

-Preaching through a book of the Bible has many advantages because you’re able to see the flow of thought and get a better understanding of the context of what God inspired an author to write. But if I were to say that there are any disadvantages (which there really are none, but I say this poking fun at myself), the disadvantage would involve being forced to preach a passage that you wouldn’t necessarily want to preach—but, it’s there in the Bible so it has to be truth, so it has to be preached.

-Why am I being so overly dramatic about this passage of Scripture? Because this passage starts out by saying WIVES, BE SUBJECT TO YOUR OWN HUSBANDS or (translations you might be more familiar with) WIVES, SUBMIT TO YOUR OWN HUSBANDS. If you just kind of leave that there without any sort of context, that could open up a whole lot of cans of worms.

-There is also the danger of those who are not married to tune it out. You think that since you’re not married that this has nothing to do with you. But it actually does, because there is a principle in this passage that goes beyond marriage and into all of life. What do I mean?

-What this passage reflects upon is the roles that God has given you on this earth. God created you just as you are, and He placed you where He has placed you, and within these contexts and environments you have certain roles that you fill.

-This made me think of MMORPGs. That stands for massive multiplayer online role playing games. These are the online versions of what people used to do around the table—kind of Dungeons and Dragons kinds of things. In these games you create a character, and part of creating the character is choosing the role that they play in the group (maybe a warrior or mage or paladin or something like that).

-In real life, you are placed in certain roles. Unlike the game, you often don’t get to choose the role, but God has given you the role. When God created the world, He put things in a certain order and He said these things are good. And the roles you play are part of that created order. And how you live out those roles will either honor God or dishonor God.

-So, marriage is but one example. The husband has been given leadership of the household, and the wife is to submit to that leadership. Those are the roles given by God. This in no way means that either party has more value or worth than the other, because even our passage says that they are equals. But it does speak of the roles that God has given in His created order. And if you try to fight against the role you are given, or you try to redefine the role that you are given, you end up fighting against God Himself.

-But what we want to do is to live within the context of the roles we have in life in ways that follow His created order and honor Him. So, that’s where we want to go with this passage today—learning to live out the roles where God has placed us in ways that honor Him and His created order.

1 Peter 3:1–7 NET 2nd ed.

1 In the same way, wives, be subject to your own husbands. Then, even if some are disobedient to the word, they will be won over without a word by the way you live, 2 when they see your pure and reverent conduct. 3 Let your beauty not be external—the braiding of hair and wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes— 4 but the inner person of the heart, the lasting beauty of a gentle and tranquil spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. 5 For in the same way the holy women who hoped in God long ago adorned themselves by being subject to their husbands, 6 like Sarah who obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. You become her children when you do what is good and have no fear in doing so. 7 Husbands, in the same way, treat your wives with consideration as the weaker partners and show them honor as fellow heirs of the grace of life. In this way nothing will hinder your prayers.

-[pray]

-Today, let’s answer the question: How can we honor God in the roles we are given?

1) Submit to God-ordained authorities (v. 1)

-The context of 1 Peter is that we are temporary residents on this earth—pilgrims. We don’t belong here because we have been given new life in Christ, and Peter is telling us how to live out this new life in Christ. In the previous passages leading to this one we learn that God has allowed certain authorities in our lives, and we are to submit to them. Peter first talked about governmental institutions—we are to submit to the government because they are ordained of God and they are tools of God for justice. Peter then talked about servants and masters—while that is not the ideal for this earth, it was a reality at that time, and servants were to serve their masters whether good or bad.

-Finally, now, in v. 1 it says that in the same way wives are to be subject / submit to their own husbands. Notice, it says their own husbands. It isn’t saying to submit to all men. God has ordained the institution of marriage, and He created the order of marriage with certain roles within the marriage—the husband is to be the leader.

-There are some who believe that Peter was merely capitulating to the culture of the day...that’s not how God really wanted it. The problem with that argument is that Paul tells us in Ephesians 5 that this order in marriage has a theological significance—because this marriage is a picture of Christ and the church. As the husband leads the wife and has authority, so Christ leads the church and has authority. Again, this in no way cheapens the value of the wife, because even here in v. 7 she is called a fellow heir of the grace of life. Husbands and wives have equal value, just different roles.

-This order of things was ordained from the beginning—the roles were defined. And then after the fall, it is warned that there would be tension within the roles because of the curse of sin. In Genesis 3:16 God warned that part of the curse is that the woman will want to control the husband, but the husband will dominate. Sin brings in the problem of the woman wanting to be the authority, and then the man using heavy-handed tactics to prevent that.

-I can’t help but think of something years ago when we went on our honeymoon to Hilton Head Island, and the hotel we stayed at was having dancing lessons one evening. And the instructors were teaching us whatever dance, but they had to keep stopping us because Trish was wanting to lead and I was sort of pushing back trying to lead, and there was this jostling going on. It was only when I led with grace that we actually danced somewhat smoothly together.

-God has ordained authorities, and it is true in most roles that we have. If we are a student, we have teachers as authorities. If we have a job, we have bosses who are authorities. If we are a member of a church, the pastor is the authority. And if we fight the authority (outside of some biblical reason), we are fighting against God who is the ultimate authority who gave that authority to these others. This is part of being in the roles we are. Then Peter also tells us to...

2) Be considerate of the witness your life gives (vv. 1-2)

-Peter writes that wives submitting to husbands bears testimony of the new life that they have in Jesus Christ. Here, in vv. 1-2, Peter encourages the Christian wives to be especially considerate of how they live around their pagan husbands who are disobedient to the word of the gospel, because when the husbands see the pure and reverent conduct by their wives they could be won over to the faith. The way you live your life is either a good or bad witness of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

-There are some who wrongly believe that if the authority that is over you is not Christian, you are no longer obligated to obey their authority. The problem is that this is not biblical. Peter says to be subject to the ruling governmental authorities whether Christian-based or not. Peter said servants should obey their master whether good or bad—whether the master is Christian or not. Wives are to be subject to their own husbands whether they are Christian or not.

-The only time that the Bible gives us an “out” is if the authority is demanding you do something unbiblical. If a husband would tell a wife to deny Christ and follow his pagan deities, they can’t do it because God and His Word are a higher authority. However, if the husband leads in a way that is not unbiblical, the wife cannot say WELL, YOU’RE NOT A CHRISTIAN SO I DON’T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU, and you start rebelling against God’s order of things, that itself is unbiblical and you lose any sort of influence you might have in leading them to Christ.

-So, Peter is telling us that within the roles that we have while we are on this earth, the way that we conduct ourselves will either confirm or deny the gospel that we teach and preach. If your spouse / employer / teacher is an unbeliever, and you live in such a way that pushes them away from Christ, you’re in the wrong. But, as the verses say, if you live in such a way that they see your pure and reverent conduct, that you live in harmony with the authorities that God has placed over you and do so with the right spirit, that is a powerful witness that opens up ears and hearts to the gospel.

-The church father Augustine gives an illustration of how the principles of this passage worked out in the life of his own mother Monica. In his book the “Confessions” [IX.,19, 22] he says: “When she became of marriageable age, she was bestowed upon a husband [who was a pagan] and served him as [unto] the Lord, and she did all that she could to win him to [You], speaking to him of [You] by her [behavior and manners], whereby [You] made her beautiful and reverently lovely and admirable to her husband.… Finally, when her husband was now at the very end of his earthly life, she won him to [You].”

-It took Monica almost her whole earthly life, but by the way she lived out here role as wife, by the witness her life gave of reverence and humility, she won her husband to the Lord near the end of his life. And this is true for whatever role we might find ourselves in. We have a chance to live within our roles in ways that live the gospel and give solid ground to the spoken gospel that we proclaim. Next, but closely related to this, Peter tells us to...

3) Emphasize Christ-like character development (vv. 3-4)

-In v. 3 Peter tells the wives not to merely let their beauty be external—braiding the hair, wearing fancy jewelry, wearing fine clothes. Now, let me make it clear, Peter is NOT saying that you cannot do any of these things. What he is saying is not to make that the focus of so much of your time and energy. Just like today where there can be such an emphasis on the types and brands of clothes you wear, that has been the case throughout history. Your clothes and jewelry and hairstyle were status symbols, and that is where so much time, energy, and money is spent.

-Peter says, don’t let these things be a waste of your life. Don’t spend so much time and money and energy on your outer appearance that you completely forget about what is important—your inner character…being a man or woman of integrity. Peter says in vv. 3-4 don’t let your beauty be external, but let your beauty be found in the inner person of the heart with the lasting beauty of a gentle and tranquil spirit. As God stated in 1 Samuel 16:7: Don’t be impressed by appearance or height. God doesn’t view things the way people do. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

-All cultures have some sort of pressure to conform to an ideal for outer beauty. And we could say that within the roles we might have on this earth, there are pressures to reach some sort of level of prestige. You fight at your job to climb the corporate ladder. You fight to be the best at everything at your school. You do what you can to make yourself physically appealing for your spouse or to attract a spouse. And these aren’t bad in and of themselves. It is when they are the focus that you really miss out on what you are doing in that role to begin with.

-Let’s face it…those who work so hard to have some sort of external prestige or beauty on the inside can often neglect their heart. And their heart and their character become so perverse and dark. You could say that some of the most beautiful people in the world are the ugliest people in the world, because their inner heart camouflages whatever outer beauty they might think they have. And if you are constantly working for things on the outside, but you neglect your heart, you aren’t making yourself beautiful and prestigious, you’re making yourself ugly.

-And so, what Peter is trying to encourage is that in whatever role you find yourself , don’t merely try to make your outside look good, but use your place as a time to develop your inner character—to become more like Christ. It’s funny, the way that Isaiah describes the Messiah, he says that there was nothing about His appearance that would attract people to Him. He says that the Messiah had no stately form or majesty that might catch people’s attention. He had no special appearance that anyone would want to follow Him. What Isaiah is prophesying is that there was nothing external about Jesus that screamed MESSIAH or GOD or even LEADER. Jesus looked just like normal folk, not handsome, not ugly, just plain. The outer was not anything special. And yet, when He taught, when He loved, when He related to people, when He let that which was within Him come out, there was no one as beautiful as Jesus—and there never will be.

-But we can develop that beauty within. Whatever role we are in, we have a chance to work on the inner heart and develop Christ-like character within us. While outer beauty will always fade away, our inner beauty can grow and shine. Another lesson about our roles, Peter tells us...

4) Do not fear the criticism of the world (vv. 5-6)

-In v. 5 Peter points out that holy women from Israel’s history lived within their roles in this way. He says that these holy women who hope in God long ago adorned themselves by being subject to their husbands. Then in v 6 he gives Sarah as an example because she obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. Before anyone gets too excited about that last part, the word was merely used as a sign of respect and reverence. It wasn’t like she was calling him master like she was a slave—the word was respectful toward the authority in her role as wife.

-But Peter goes on to say that women become children of Sarah when they follow her example, do what is good, and he says HAVE NO FEAR IN DOING SO. It literally says not fearing any intimidation. Peter is encouraging the wives in their roles as wives to follow God’s order of things, and don’t let anybody try to intimidate you into doing anything different.

-When you follow God’s ways of doing things in the roles that you have, the world is going to criticize you because it goes against the grain of everything it stands for. When you allow God and His Word determine how you are going to live, the world is going to call you all sorts of names and do whatever it can to humiliate you to try to bring you lockstep into line with its morals and ethics and worldview. The world wants to mold you into another one of its minions.

-And Peter is encouraging the ladies (but it is an encouragement for us all) not to be afraid…not to be intimidated into falling into line with the world. Instead, without fear, follow God’s Word and follow God’s Way. The modern feminist movement will try to tell you that being a wife and being a mother are menial and low-brow and beneath women. They will try to tell you that being a wife and mother is some form of enslavement and that it somehow takes away from your value. But God tells us that these roles are of immense value and importance. I find it laughable that people try to say that Christianity and the Bible demean women, when in actuality it lifted the status of women wherever it was allowed to have influence.

-You might have a role as a teacher, and the world tries to force you to push its agenda—but you have been given a stewardship and you need to push back against the world. You might have the role of a student and the system tries to demean your Christian faith as it tries to mold you into tiny Marxists, but you need not be afraid and you push back. Don’t let the world scare you away from living the way God tells you to live. Very quickly...

5) Honor the people God puts in your life (v. 7)

-In v. 7 Peter finally talks to the husbands and says that as the authority they are to treat their wives with consideration / understanding, knowing how God has created them and what role they play, and to honor them as a fellow-heir of grace. The second great command of loving your neighbor as yourself comes into play here—your spouse is your neighbor and you are to love her and honor her and make sure you always treat her well. Because, if you do not treat her well, your prayers will be hindered—God will stop up His ears to you if you are not treating her right and honoring her.

-But this is true of any of our roles. We are called to love our neighbor as ourselves in our schools. We are called to love our neighbor as ourselves in our jobs. We are called to love our neighbor as ourselves in our families. We are called to love our neighbor as ourselves in our churches. Everywhere, whatever role we play is to be marked by honor for everyone that we deal with—whether we are the authority or they are the authority, whether or not they are Christian, we are to honor people. And this is how we honor God.

Conclusion

-God has a created order, and He has ordained certain things to act in certain ways. He has ordained that certain roles play out in certain ways so that His creation works in harmony. If we decide that we know better than God on how these roles are to play out, we will make a mess of things—just as we’ve seen has been happening. If you go against God’s created order, it leads to chaos and anarchy. If you fight against God’s ordained authorities, it never bodes well.

For some reason I kept thinking about the Planet of the Apes—the original one from the 60s. God created man to be in His image to have dominion over the earth. But what you find in Planet of the Apes is that the monkeys have dominion and there’s just all sorts of chaos.

-That was unnatural—it goes against God’s created order. Instead of rebelling against the role that God has you in, let God use you in that role to glorify His name. Let the beauty of who you are in Christ be an amazing testimony of His goodness no matter what role you have, no matter what authority is over you. Christian, come and pray that you would glorify God in the roles that He has for you.

-But the most important role is to be a child of God, and that only happens when you believe in Jesus and are saved...