Identity: The Orphan Spirit
Identity - Who are you? • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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Introduction:
Introduction:
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Good morning and thank you for joining us today as we continue our series on Identity. I originally thought we may move on to something different, but this subject is so deep and the culture is so messed up on this issue, that we are going to continue on for at least a couple of weeks longer. God willing we will move on and I’m praying that the Lord will lead us into the Gospel of John next, but we shall see.
Today, I want to tackle something that I only brought up in passing in a previous sermon. In the sermon from June 11, called Identity and Purpose, I talked about one of the ways that we can get our identity wrong is by seeing ourselves as orphans rather than adopted. I felt like we needed to spend a little more time on that topic, so today we are going to talk about the orphan spirit, that I believe is plaguing the church today.
Too many say “Our Father” on Sunday and spend the rest of the week acting like orphans.
Billy Graham
Billy Graham recognized this as a problem many years ago. And it’s my opinion, that this hasn’t gotten better, but has indeed gotten worse. In fact, I’d suggest that many of us in this room, whether we know it or not, suffer from an orphan spirit. Now part of it is cultural. We live in a culture that promotes rugged individualism. It’s all about me. Self-love, self-care, self-centered. We are all about the self. That self-centeredness produces an orphan spirit. We don't connect with God or our brothers and sisters in Christ.When we cease to care for our brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, what we find is that we are orphans.
The other way that it has infiltrated our mindset is through the dissolution of family in society. Today, fathers and mothers are forgotten or non-existent. We have regulated friends, co-workers, teachers, etc. to higher places in our own personal lives than parents and grandparents. Society denigrates anything that’s fatherly as patriarchal and therefore worthy of dismissal. Fathers are made to look like buffoon and moms are told that they need to be more concerned with themselves, rather than their children and families.
So the orphan spirit is alive and well within the church. And this brings me to the main point of my message today:
Jesus Came To Give Orphans A Family
If you are feeling like an orphan today, after hearing this message, then my message to you is this, God has a family for you. You do not need to feel alone, lonely, rejected or whatever. You are in his family and his love for you is great, even when you can’t feel it.
Romans 8:29 “For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.” We were meant to be his family. And the orphan spirit that we carry is holding us back. Let’s shed this thing today.
Today, I want to start by looking at Lamentations 5. Turn with me and lets read verses 1-5.
Remember, O Lord, what has befallen us; look, and see our disgrace! Our inheritance has been turned over to strangers, our homes to foreigners. We have become orphans, fatherless; our mothers are like widows. We must pay for the water we drink; the wood we get must be bought. Our pursuers are at our necks; we are weary; we are given no rest.
Now most of you may not be familiar with the book of Lamentations, so here’s a little context. The book was written around 586 BC after the fall of Jerusalem and was likely written by the prophet Jeremiah. It’s made up of five poems, that are essentially a eulogy, mourning the capture of Jerusalem by the Babylonians. In other words, this is written during a dark period in Israel’s history.
Now, the purpose of the book, is simple. It’s to give God’s people hope. That even though they are going through dark times, there is reason to hope and hope starts with gratitude. So the pinnacle of the book is this...
Lamentations 3:22–23 (ESV)
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Jeremiah reminds the people of Israel in the midst of their suffering that God is still faithful. So the writer is not writing this just to lament the issues, but to remind people of the faithfulness of God in spite of living in dark times.
We pick up in Lamentations 5, which is the start of the last poem. This passage culminates with a big identity statement in verse 3 - We have become orphans. That’s an identity statement and it’s not a good one. This wasn’t the Lord’s doing, this was their own doing. So let’s define what an orphan is first. There are essentially three different meanings to this idea found in Scripture, the first is the basic definition, which means to have no parents. The second, is similar, but a little more specific, it means to have no father. And the final definition of this word found in Scripture means to have no guides, teachers, or guardians.
Jeremiah is using this word with purpose and he’s pointing it at the fact that they feel abandoned by God. They are in captivity and all alone, so they feel abandoned. There are three ideas in this text that I want to explore as they relate to this orphan spirit that I’m talking about today.
Our Inheritance is Gone.
Our needs are not met.
We cannot find rest.
Let’s look at these individually.
Our Inheritance Is Gone
Our Inheritance Is Gone
An inheritance is something you receive, but it’s also something you pass on. As orphans, we believe the lie that there’s nothing to be given to us and we don’t have anything to pass on to our family. If you have no money, sorry kids, no inheritance. With the way inflation is going, many of us will have to have that conversation with our kids.
In church language though, this means we don’t feel like we have anything to offer our brothers and sisters. So we don’t serve. We don’t participate in the body. We don’t give of ourselves to other family members. Remember an inheritance is passed on. Remember the purpose of an inheritance (this is what the prodigal son got wrong) is not to receive it, but to give it. It’s not meant to be kept. You’ve heard the old saying that you never see a Uhaul following a hearse.
In other words, what you have, what you have been given in your life is always meant to be given away. There is nothing that you have been given that you are meant to hoard away. This is a fundamental understanding of life, but for many of us we struggle with trying with this aspect of the orphan spirit.
Some reasons why:
We don’t have anything to give.
We are selfish and don’t want to give what we have away.
We don’t think we are worthy to serve.
Our Needs Are Not Met
Our Needs Are Not Met
The next thing I noticed about orphans in this passage has to do with provision. When you have an orphan spirit, you don’t believe you’re needs are getting met. Doesn’t this describe most marriages today? Why do you want a divorce? My needs aren’t being met.
How about work? Why are you leaving your job? This job just isn’t meeting my needs anymore. I want more out of life than this. Orphans are constantly looking for others to meet their needs. Look at this passage in verse 4. The complaint here is that we must pay for the water we drink and the wood must be bought. In other words, we have to supply our own needs. This is orphan mentality.
What makes this orphan mentality? It’s found in the overlooking of God as the ultimate provider. God is our father, he supplies our needs. He gives us the money to buy water. He gives us the wood to heat our homes. He provides everything.
But in this case, it’s more sinister, God’s people weren’t used to having to supply their own needs. They were exiles and now they had to pay for everything. And this is where lack of gratitude always leads…it leads to complaining.
If you find yourself complaining a lot, you are likely suffering from a lack of gratitude that finds its root in an orphan spirit. You aren’t trusting in God for your provision, so you are ungrateful and that leads you to complain.
Orphans Cannot Find Rest
Orphans Cannot Find Rest
Here’s the third thing I see in this passage. Orphans cannot rest. Look at verse 5, we are weary and we are given no rest. Orphans are weary and restless. Part of being an orphan means you are fatherless. You have no father, you have no protection. Men are designed to be protectors. I had a bad dream the other night and in the dream, I failed to protect my family. I was shook. Couldn’t go back to sleep. God has put something in men that drives them to be protectors of their families.
When you don’t have a father though, you don’t feel that security. You always sleep with one eye open, because no one is there to protect you. You get no rest. In our spiritual lives, our lack of fathers works in a similar way. We are weary. We have to work twice as hard without a father. We work ourselves to the point of weariness because we are orphans.
Let’s think about this deeper. Do you feel like you need to work to earn God’s approval? That’s an orphan spirit. You are wearing yourself out trying to earn his favor. He has already given you his favor. It’s grace. Jesus died for you. There is nothing else you need to do to earn his favor, you already have it! Whenever we work for favor, we are saying essentially, that we don’t trust God. If you feel like you have to do all the right things in order for God to love you, that’s manipulation and not love. Agape Love expresses itself as unconditional favor. God is giving you favor in spite of what you deserve.
And this leads us to the lack of rest - when we are striving for favor, when we are striving for acceptance, hallmarks of an orphan spirit, we cannot rest. And that describes many of us in this room. We refuse to rest. Some of us work relentlessly for God’s favor. Others just work relentlessly. In fact, for some of you, the only time you have to give God is right now. We have so crammed our weeks with stuff, that God couldn’t get an appointment with you for the next three weeks, even if offered you a free lunch.
Our culture celebrates this lifestyle. It celebrates doing and frowns on resting. If I ask any one of you how are you doing, most people will describe their life as “busy.” This is the orphan spirit. We are busy and we cannot stop. We cannot rest. We are tired, yet we are given no rest. We are striving, yet we are getting no where. All of our work is accomplishing no eternal reward. And some of us will blame it on the kids. Baseball practice, soccer, dance, whatever. We sign them up for these activities. We sign away our rest because we are fearful of what God may speak to us as soon as we slow down and give him a chance to catch us.
Orphans will search for acceptance and love everywhere except from the Father’s heart. We want our kids to love us, we want our spouse to love us, we want our neighbors to think well of us, we want it all, but we will not seek the Father’s face. Always striving, never resting.
So this lead me to this idea. Maybe you’ve seen yourself in what I’m saying or maybe not. I’m not sure many of us could tell if we have an orphan spirit or not. I’m going to give you three ways to tell...
How to tell if you are dealing with an orphan spirit:
How to tell if you are dealing with an orphan spirit:
Our feelings a lot of times are like a thermometer to our lives. It tells us what’s going on inside of us and many of us fight them down the best we can, but they are still there and the only way to beat this spirit is to deal with what’s going on inside of you. Change your mind, repent.
I Feel Shame and Guilt
I Feel Shame and Guilt
We may not use this word much anymore, but the Apostle Paul did and I think it ties into what I’m saying here. He used the word condemnation. We feel condemned. We feel shame for our lives and guilt from our sin. This is what I believe to be hallmarks of the orphan spirit.
What we are doing is this. We look at the Bible or we look at brothers and sisters in Christ and we compare our lives to theirs and we find ourselves as not measuring up. We look at our failures, we look at our sins, we look at our past and we feel guilt. We feel condemned. Paul understood this, so he says...
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
In other words, you don’t have to feel condemnation anymore. You are free from that because of what Jesus did. Just like Jacob talked about last week, we are no longer under the law, we have been set free from the law and our lives are now found in Christ. And Christ has taken away our shame and guilt. You have been forgiven. You are in the family. Don’t trust your feelings, trust Jesus.
I Feel Lonely or Isolated
I Feel Lonely or Isolated
The second emotion Orphans deal with is loneliness or isolation. When we are orphans, we find reasons to avoid our brothers and sisters in Christ. We don’t know how to handle true family. I’ve seen people jump from church to church mainly because they are afraid to let people in. Their lives are a wreck and as soon as someone gets close, they start to withdraw. They start to run. This happens all the time.
But in a more general sense, if you are a part of this church and you feel lonely or isolated, I apologize. I don’t believe anyone is doing that to you on purpose. I do believe that it is everyone’s responsibility to reach out to each other. And most importantly, if we are feeling this way, the best way to fight that feeling is to pursue other people.
Purposely pursuing others is the best way to fight a feeling of loneliness. You are not alone. There is an entire of body of believers here with you. If you want someone to be with, call them. Reach out. Let people know how you are feeling. Let me know.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
Anonymous
The orphan spirit tries to convince you that you are all alone and no one wants to be with you. Whether its in a tough time of your life, are just a normal every day type of thing. The orphan spirit tries to convince us that we are alone.
I Feel a Lack of Intimacy With God
I Feel a Lack of Intimacy With God
This is probably the biggest issue with the orphan spirit. As an orphan, orphans often deal with intimacy issues. When you’ve been abandoned, it’s hard for you to trust and open up to someone else. This is natural. As spiritual orphans, we tend to do the same with God. Even though we know that he is our father, our orphan spirit will not allow us to receive his adoption as a son. We instead fight against that intimacy or run from it.
How does this looks in our own lives? We have no quiet time. We have no prayer time. We have no time in His word. We won’t stop and listen for him to speak because we fear intimate encounters with him.
Intimacy has two sides to it:
We reveal ourselves to someone.
They reveal themselves to us.
Now a lot of us are open to one but not the other. Some of us are willing to bear our hearts to God, but we won’t seek him to know him more. Others have no issue seeking after God, but they will not bare their soul to him. Intimacy is a two way street. Some of us fall into both of these, we don’t really seek Him and we are unable to bare our souls to Him. Now, I have found that most people will fall into the seeking him mode, but they keep their walls up. If that’s you, there’s hope, but you have to humble yourself and be willing to open up. You have to allow Him behind your walls. You need him to tear the walls down.
Closing
Closing
In fact, this leads me to what our response to this message should be today. There’s only one real response. We have to change our mind. We have to see where we have given ourselves over to the Orphan mentality and fight it. We’ve got to weed it out of our lives.
Lam 3:22-23 “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
So I’d like to invite you to find someone else in the room and pray with them. Confess where you’ve see the orphan spirit in your life and ask them to pray for God to renew your mind. God is faithful to help you, if you ask. So we are going to have a time of prayer while Dave plays and then I will close us.