10/15/2023 - Will This Ever End?

As I said, I did not want to preach this sermon, but I have to stand back and be amazed at how God placed this sermon in my plans at this time in my life.

I have titled this sermon, “Will This Ever End?”

It is a fitting title, and a question that is often asked in counselling, in grief support groups, and in pastor’s offices.

The direct answer is no, but it will get somewhat easier.

Have you ever looked at your life, or a situation that you find yourself in, and just felt let down by God?

You look around you and you just feel dissapointed in God.

You don’t want to say it out loud, but you feel it in your heart and your spirit.

You are not alone…David felt it, Elijah felt it, Job felt it, Habakkuk felt it.

Have you ever found yourself angry at God?

Have you ever told him?

I have…The first time I went to my mother’s grave after the funeral was over, and life began to move on…It was actually the morning we were going to leave on vacation to Tennessee.

I had to go somewhere to get something, and I passed the cemetery, and I decided I would stop by there.

I got out of my car, and the feeling hit my stomach like a brick inside my gut.

Despair, anger, grief.

I stood at my mother’s grave, and I told God that I was angry at Him.

I wasn’t disrespectful, I didn’t yell, I just expressed my heart.

I wanted more time,

I wanted more healing,

I wanted to share my church with my mother,

and I wanted to share my mother with my church.

I wanted to be able to seek her wisdom about raising my kids, about dealing with people, about plans for my future.

But I can’t any longer.

And I was mad.

And I felt God take it my anger… I felt God listening to my hearts crying, and my bodies weeping.

Habakkuk asked some hard questions here in verses 2-3 of chapter 1.

And in these verses we get a picture of

I. The Circumstances of the Griever

Perhaps you do not find yourself grieving at this moment.

You are not in the circumstances that many others in this room find themselves.

But I will tell you…You will!

Everyone of our loved ones will die…the statistics are grim…one in every one person dies.

When you do find yourself in these circumstances you will find yourself asking these same hard questions.

Habakkuk cried, how long shall I cry, and thou wilt not hear! Even cry out unto thee of violence, and thou wilt not save!

Habakkuk is an interesting book…most of the prophets wrote what God spoke and gave it to the people.

Habakkuk writes what He is speaking to God, and then records God’s answers.

It is a series of prayers.

Habakkuk has found himself in a country that is vile, and wicked.

They have rejected God and has turned to violence amongst their own people.

Habakkuk records his grief at what he sees around him, his grief at the loss of his country (God’s chosen people) to wickedness.

And Habakkuk begins with a question for God as to why Heaven is Silent to his grief.

How long does this need to go on?

have you felt that way?

Maybe you are grieving a loss of a spouse

or the loss of a child

or the loss of a parent

or the loss of a child to the world

or the loss of a job that you invested so much into

or the loss of a dream

or the loss of a marriage

Whatever you are grieving, it sometimes feels that heaven is silent in your grief.

and you may find yourself asking - How long??

Habakkuk in verse three asks another question that is often asked by those who mourn…Why

3 Why dost thou shew me iniquity, and cause me to behold grievance? For spoiling and violence are before me: And there are that raise up strife and contention.

Habakkuk asks why does God allow this violence…our situation may be different

Why did you let them die

Why did you not heal them

Why did they not catch the disease earlier

Why did the accident have to happen

Why are you allowing me to hurt so much?

Habakkuk 3:16

In chapter 3:16 Habakkuk basically says he is unraveling …coming apart at the seams.

He has heard from God and what God said was not good news, it was more bad news…judgement was coming…and God was going to bring judgement by way of people even more wicked than Israel.

And Habakkuk finds himself coming apart...

Turn with me over to chapter 3 verse 16

16 When I heard, my belly trembled; My lips quivered at the voice: Rottenness entered into my bones, and I trembled in myself, That I might rest in the day of trouble: When he cometh up unto the people, he will invade them with his troops.

He is falling apart.

He sits in wonder at what God is telling him…That I might rest in the day of trouble: When he cometh up unto the people, he will invade them with his troops.

He is wondering What is God thinking?

Have you ever asked yourself that?

God, Why?

I know Your ways are not our ways, and Your thoughts are not our thoughts…but what are You thinking?

So we see the Circumstances of the Griever, and many of us know it well....Now let us look at....

II. The Choice of the Griever

This secular world around us gives us many options.

When we are grieving many come to us with advice and opinions.

There are no shortage of opinions.

I’ve heard said, that opinions are like belly buttons, everyone's got one and no one wants to see it.

Some will say you need to choose

A. Resignation

“If you want to heal from this, you just need to resign to it.”

It has happened, what will be, will be…just accept it and move on.

By the way you will never move on…you may move along…but you will never move on…You carry the person with you forever…and isn’t that the way it should be?

But some will say, just resign to the facts, and you will be able to move forward.

I guess it was just his/her time.

Everything happens for a reason, life goes on

Others say you need to choose

B. Detachment

Just don’t think about it…bear down and keep moving forward.

Dive into work, or hobbies and just don’t think about it.

The problem with this is grief always has a way of forcing us to deal with it.

And often delayed grief is far worse than just going ahead and doing the grief work that is necessary to heal.

and then there are those who just say you need to have

C. Bravado

Hold your chin up!

Put on the brave face.

Grit your teeth and bear it.

You’ll get through this…stay strong

Grief is uncomfortable…especially someone else’s grief.

We don’t know what to say, or how to act.

It is just uncomfortable.

By the way some things you might can say:

I can’t imagine what you’re going through. (although you actually can imagine…which is why it is uncomfortable.)

I’m so sorry for your loss.

I don’t know what to say, I wish I had the right words to comfort you.

You, and your family will be in my prayers.

Share a happy memory of the person who passed

If and Whenever you want to talk, just know I am a phone call away.

They were so wonderful, he/she’ll be missed by so many people.

I’m your friend—I’m here for you.

If you can’t think of anything to say, a hug may be appropriate

Sometimes just be with the person, you don’t have to say anything.

But whatever you do…be careful with your opinions.

But what principles of grief does God’s Word present?

What did Habakkuk choose?

In chapter 3 and verse 17, Habakkuk says an amazing word…look at Habakkuk 3:17 with me.

Habakkuk 3:17

The word that stands out to me is the word...Although...

Even though I am hurting

Even though I am grieving

Even though I don’t understand

Even though I can’t change this

Even though I am angry

Even though I am dissapointed

In Habakkuk’s situation he says

17 Although the fig tree shall not blossom, Neither shall fruit be in the vines; The labour of the olive shall fail, And the fields shall yield no meat; The flock shall be cut off from the fold, And there shall be no herd in the stalls:

Although the fig tree shall not blossom - no fruit this year.

Although there will be no fruit on the vines - no grapes, no juice.

Although the labour of the olive shall fail - no oil, no olives

Although the fields shall yield no meat - no harvest, no meat, because the cattle have starved.

Although the herd is not in the stalls - they have dwindled.

Notice that each of these things are the result of no rain.

this is a situation that Habakkuk can’t do anything about.

It is completely out of his control…Although all these things happen…I will rejoice in the Lord...

D. Focus on God

Habakkuk 3:18

18 Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.

I can’t do anything to fix this...

I don’t know how long this is going to last

I don’t know why this has happened

By the way…Job asked why…and then for 42 chapters they did nothing but talk about it!

Then God came and showed Himself for who He is…and Job repented…he changed his mind regarding the situation…He never got an answer!

He just shifted his focus!

Although my world around me is crumbling

Although I don’t understand…I Will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.

It is a choice!

Praise Him, not because of the situation, but despite the situation.

David throughout the psalms, over and over again, poured out his heart to God....

I can’t hear from you!

These people are attacking me

my situation is bleak

And yet over and over David turns to praise - I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.

I will…what powerful words.

I will pick my Bible back up and more about learn about my God

Not seeking my answers…but seeking my God

I will get back on my knees and I will pour my heart out to God

my hurt, my pain, my doubts, my despair…all of it.

I will be faithful to God’s house.

I will get the perspective from God’s word given by those who are not under my circumstances.

I will fellowship with my brothers and sisters.

I will serve and pour my life and heart into others.

I Will rejoice in the Lord.

Because even if we can’t see it....he is faithful…He is worthy of our rejoicing…he is in control, even if it is not the way we would have wanted.

I Will rejoice…That is the Choice of the Griever...

Now let us see what the results are as we look at ...

III. The Capability of the Griever

Habakkuk 3:19

19 The Lord God is my strength, And he will make my feet like hinds’ feet, And he will make me to walk upon mine high places. To the chief singer on my stringed instruments.

At the end of his prayers, Habakkuk came to some realizations.

Even in the midst of his grief...

even in the midst of God’s judgement on His people...

Even in the midst of famine and despair...

He can choose to rejoice - I will…and the results are…we ...

A. Get Strength from God

The Lord is my strength.

Reminds me of Isaiah 40:29-31

Isaiah 40:29–31 KJV

29 He giveth power to the faint; And to them that have no might he increaseth strength. 30 Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall: 31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings as eagles; They shall run, and not be weary; And they shall walk, and not faint.

We will all find ourselves growing weary and faint…but if we wait upon the Lord

This word wait is a verb meaning to wait for, to look for, to hope for.

The root word means to twist or wind around...

The word is used to signify depending on and ordering activities around a future event.

This is the true idea of hope - we wait expectantly completely wrapped…twisted…wound around our hope in God.

What is the result?

Strength is renewed

Soaring above the circumstances

Running but not weary

Moving forward…but not fainting.

In our grief…we choose to joy in God

We choose to hope in Him

We choose to believe that He knows what He is doing…even though I can’t see it.

My pastor used to tell of sitting at the feet of his mother while she did needlework…I have done so many times at the feet of my mother while she crosstiched, and fully understood what he meant.

he would look in confusion as she sewed patterns that had threads going back and forth in a non-decipherable pattern.

beautiful colors here and there, but then she would get a black, ugly thread and it would go all over.

“Why are you using those black threads?” he would ask his mom.

“They are ugly compared to the beautiful blues, and teals, and yellows.”

“Just wait until I’m finished...” his mother would say, “and I will show you.”

When she finished her work, she took the young boy upon her knee and he saw from her perspective.

The threads that went from one part to the other were connecting the blues together to make a picture.

The happy yellows were placed here and there connected on the back by seemingly nonsense patterns, but were orderly from her perspective.

The dark and gloomy black thread did it’s work to complete the image, outline the parts, and add shadow to complete the picture.

In life we may not understand why the dark threads of our life are interspersed with the happy yellows and beautiful blues… but someday, Lord willing, we will see the picture of our life from God’s perspective.

Until then…we rely on God for our strength.

But Habakkuk continued in verse 19…Yes we can get our strength from God…But he says we can also ...

B. Get Stability from God

…And he will make my feet like hinds’ feet,

One of the most amazing things about the mountain deer, or mountain goats is their surefootedness.

I remember when Michelle and I were just married, we travelled together for my job.

We got to see some amazing things.

When we were in the Idaho, Wyoming, Montana area… I don’t remember exactly where, I remember seeing a flock of mountain goats climbing and walking on a cliffs edge.

Picture of the Goats

Second picture

They were all over this cliff edge…walking on edges that were barely large enough for their hoofs and some points higher up.

And yet they climbed up the edge without fear.

I went bolder jumping on a mountain in Southern Oklahoma when I was a teenager…we climbed the mountain and then tried to find our own way back down.

at one point we came to a small cliff edge, it was about an 8-10 foot drop.

My feet were not stable like hinds’ feet!

I hung onto a branch of a tree on the edge, and felt and felt for a foot hold as I went over the edge, but the tree branch got impatient with me and broke off.

Down I went the 8-10 feet and hit my head…that explains a lot about your pastor doesn’t it!

Mike, my brother was up above still coming down to the edge and didn’t know how long the drop had been..we had just crossed over an area that had well over a 100’ drop where we had to cross over a section that had a ridge edge that was separated from the mountain edge by about two feet…so there was a large drop on both sides of this ridge. so we walked across sideways leaning over to the cliff edge with our hands to stabilize us.

This is all Mike could think about as he came up to the small cliff edge to see me 8-10 feet below rubbing my head.

I try to stay away from mountains now a days.

I try to stay away from peer pressure that tries to get me up those mountains as well!

My feet are not like hinds feet…but God has promised to stabilize our lives.

It may feel out of control right now.

The grief may feel like it is tearing you apart right now…but God will make your feet stable like hinds feet.

Yes God will give you Strength

God will Give you Stability

But thirdly…God will allow you to...

C. Get Over the Mountains with God

…and he will make me to walk upon mine high places.

High places are beautiful to look at from a distance.

We often talk about the mountains and the valleys of this life…and the mountains are the good times.

But when we talk about trekking through this life, when we talk about crossing over those mountains…those are the insurmountable situations.

Those are the things that we want God to move.

We go to the cubbard and we pull out the mustard seed and we tell God…You said this is all the faith I needed…Ok it’s your turn!

Move this mountain…but sometimes he doesn’t.

Oh, for sure…some times he does!!!

But other times, it is His Sovereign will for us to go over the mountains…to go through the mountains.

He will make me to walk upon mine high places.

Highway 1 in California is an incredible journey up the coast of California from Los Angeles to San Francisco.

But you better be ready for some curves!

From time to time you come to a bridge that connects one mountain edge to another.

You see some beautiful things…this picture was taken through the arch of the bridge wall...

When I was studying for this sermon, I thought of these bridges.

Many times God brings us to these bridges in our life…He doesn’t remove the mountains…below this bridge are rocks, and waves of the ocean, dangers of many kinds.

But the designer didn’t remove the dangers…he just built a way to go over it.

To go through it, sometimes.

He will make me to walk upon mine high places.

Grief is a part of life.

Every person will experience grief.

It is a part of this fallen world we live in.

But grief is not sin…God grieves!

Ephesians 4.30 says

Ephesians 4:30 KJV

30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.

What does God grieve about?

Let’s look at the context for just a little side note...

Ephesians 4:29–32 KJV

29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. 30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

We grieve God by our unholy communication, our anger, our bitterness our strife!

We grieve God when we do not forgive, as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven us.

But back to the point, grief is not sin.

But it is something that is a result of this sinful world.

We will all experience it.

We can choose to wallow in our grief, and live a life doomed to a cycle of grief…or we can Choose to Rejoice in God,

and allow Him to give us the strength we need,

allow Him to Stabilize our feet as we walk

Allow Him to get us over this mountain.

Conclusion

In a book on Mourning written by a pastor of many years, actually he pastored the First Baptist church of Vallejo, CA…the city my dad came from…but another church…This pastor tells us that the path to healing involves choices.

These choices will determine the severity and the longevity of our Acute Grief.

Once the shock of the loss wears off, and we go through the acute stage of grief that we all must go through…there comes a fork in the path.

We can continue in the cycle of grief and resign our selves to the “poor me” attitude, the Chronic depression, the anger toward ourselves and everyone around us, the low life satisfaction…or

We can choose to readjust - It may take one or two years from the time of loss to see real adjustment…but we choose to trust God, to rejoice in Him

We choose to move forward over the mountain with God’s help.

We reorganize our life

we complete the grief work that is necessary

We pick up the interests we once had

We set and attain new goals

we form new friendships and associations

We find our identity, not as a spouse, parent, child, or whatever it might be…but find our identity in the one who never changes…I am a child of God, and He will never leave me.

More…he will give me strength

More…he will stabilize my feet

More…he will walk with me upon mine high places.

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