Proverbs 14:9–10
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I. Dwelling with Favor
I. Dwelling with Favor
Fools make a mock at sin: But among the righteous there is favour.
You have almost certainly heard this verse many times before, so I probably won’t tell you anything today that you didn’t already basically understand. But this is still a powerful truth and one that can either land our lives in a load of trouble or bring great favor to it.
A. Chasing Death
A. Chasing Death
Let’s break this verse down piece by piece.
We looked in depth at the character of a fool when we started Proverbs, but let’s review some of his main characteristics so we know who we’re talking about. This is someone who has said in his heart there is no God. He relies on his own understand and does what is right in his eyes. Instead of acknowledging God in all his ways, he rejects him at every turn, instead choosing the way that he likes best. He lacks wisdom and even finds it repulsive. This is the kind of person we see in this verse.
Second, we see what this fool does. He “makes a mock at sin.” We all know what mocking means, but it’s usually connected to someone mocking something good. Not something bad. So what does it mean for a fool to mock sin? It becomes clear when we look at some definitions.
speak words which show no respect for the object
DBL
to imitate in contempt or derision; to mimick for the sake of derision; to deride by mimicry.
WD1828
The key here is treating the object of mocking without respect. This usually is expressed in Scripture as counting God’s commands, or wise words of advice, as without value. But you can also lack respect for evil in that you do not acknowledge how destructive it really is. If you do not respect a rattlesnake that’s a few feet away from you and give it space, what’s going to happen? If you don’t respect the edge of a cliff and get as close as you can to impress your friends, what’s going to happen? Mocking danger, failing to attribute the power to it that it has, is just as devastating as mocking good.
It is as sport to a fool to do mischief: But a man of understanding hath wisdom.
As a mad man who casteth firebrands, arrows, and death, So is the man that deceiveth his neighbour, And saith, Am not I in sport?
Ultimately, this mocking comes from a root of pride. If you’re getting as close to a rattlesnake as you can, trying to prove how it can’t touch you, you are assuming that you are more special than all the other people in the world who did the same thing and were bitten. If you edge as close as you can get to sin, playing with it here and there, eventually it will bite you. Study the Bible and you’ll see how it has a perfect track record of doing so.
Paul wrote to some Christians who thought the sins of the Israelites weren’t a danger to any of them. This is what he had to say.
1 Corinthians 10:1–12 (KJV)
Moreover, brethren, I would not that ye should be ignorant, how that all our fathers were under the cloud, and all passed through the sea; And were all baptized unto Moses in the cloud and in the sea; And did all eat the same spiritual meat; And did all drink the same spiritual drink: for they drank of that spiritual Rock that followed them: and that Rock was Christ. But with many of them God was not well pleased: for they were overthrown in the wilderness. Now these things were our examples, to the intent we should not lust after evil things, as they also lusted. Neither be ye idolaters, as were some of them; as it is written, The people sat down to eat and drink, and rose up to play. Neither let us commit fornication, as some of them committed, and fell in one day three and twenty thousand. Neither let us tempt Christ, as some of them also tempted, and were destroyed of serpents. Neither murmur ye, as some of them also murmured, and were destroyed of the destroyer. Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come. Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall.
There’s one more way we can take this too. When you mock something and make fun of it, it slowly becomes acceptable. You can see many things like drunkenness, homosexuality, and adultery starring in jokes in many TV shows. It was considered evil at one time. Then it was laughed at. Now it’s commonplace. When we laugh at people sinning, we are exposing ourselves to participating in that sin and being destroyed because of it.
But when we hate sin and run from it, there is a huge contrast in the outcome.
B. Pursued by Favor
B. Pursued by Favor
The second half of the verse says, “among the righteous there is favour.” The word among here means:
between; in the midst of; within
Vine
It’s a beautiful picture. The favor of God and man will surround a righteous person because he hates sin. It’s like Psalm 23:
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: And I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
In addition to a righteous man dwelling in God’s house, favor will also dwell in the righteous man’s house. Goodness and mercy will follow him. When someone looks at the man’s family, they will not only see his children but see favor too. Favor will be between him and troubles, in the midst of his relationships, and within his spirit.
This favor is the goodwill and acceptance of others. This includes God, who pours out blessings on those who obey him, and also men, who naturally respect upright living (even if they don’t show it).
This promise of favor is to a righteous man—that is, the complete opposite of someone who makes a mock at sin. This is someone who hates sin and turns away from the sight of it. Think of Joseph when he was approached by Potiphar’s wife. His answer to her invitation was “How can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?” He hated the thought of breaking God’s heart through sin. And because of it, he eventually received great favor in Pharaoh's eyes.
II. The Unknowable Heart
II. The Unknowable Heart
The heart knoweth his own bitterness; And a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
To be honest, this verse was a hard verse to work through. There’s one word specifically that is confusing, but we can still gather the main point of the verse.
A. Alone in Sorrow
A. Alone in Sorrow
“The heart knoweth his own bitterness” means that the only person who understands someone’s grief is the person feeling that grief. If someone else is going through a trial, you hurt with them, but it is impossible for you to know exactly what they’re feeling—especially if you haven’t gone through the same thing yourself.
For what man knoweth the things of a man, save the spirit of man which is in him? even so the things of God knoweth no man, but the Spirit of God.
In my Biblical Counseling class I learned about why and how to share the burdens of others. We should come alongside other Christians and walk with them through their troubles. But even in that, none of us can really understand that person’s heart. Only his own heart knows his pain and to help bear the burden a counselor has to use skillful questions to draw out what is going on.
Because of this fact, the verse shows how we should always consider what people might be going through as we interact with them. Maybe they don’t show much grief, but they alone know how much they are hurting. We should seek to be as faithful a friend as we can to that person, rather than ignoring their heart.
As he that taketh away a garment in cold weather, And as vinegar upon nitre, So is he that singeth songs to an heavy heart.
If you are suffering, the most useless thing anyone can say is to cheer up. In that moment you can’t change how you feel. This verse reminds us to be considerate of that.
B. Alone in Joy
B. Alone in Joy
This second part of the verse is where it gets confusing. The English word “intermeddle” basically means to stick your nose into other people’s business, or to be part of something in a way that interferes with it. It’s very similar to the root word you see in there, “meddle.” However, two of the three Hebrew dictionaries I looked at show that it just means mingling with or taking part in, minus the negative connotations. That is also the interpretation of every commentator I read. They all say that this means people share in great joys that no one else knows about or can partake in. This makes sense, but it goes against the English word that the translators chose. Adding to the lack of clearness, the word “intermeddle” is used only one other time in the Bible, which is also not super clear.
I believe “intermeddle” was used instead of something like “partake in” for a reason. It certainly does imply that this stranger will not be a participant in a joyful heart. But I believe it’s saying that a stranger—that is, someone who is not close to this person—will also not interfere with true joy that is in someone’s heart. Just like no one can truly understand or relief the sorrow of another, no one can fully take part or remove someone’s joy that springs from God. Think of the Pharisees beating Peter and John and only increasing their joy because of it.
There’s an encouragement here that, though we may endure sorrow that no human understands, if we’re walking with God we’ll also partake in joy that no carnal man can have or stop.
There’s a final, unstated encouragement in this verse. Though no stranger will understand our bitterness or joy, God always does. He fully knows our experiences even better than we do.
Shall not God search this out? For he knoweth the secrets of the heart.
Not only does he know, but he also cares. He is walking by our side in the bitterness and revealing his glory in the joy.
For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.
No matter which situation you find yourself in—whether you feel alone in suffering, sadness, loneliness, or whether you feel like there’s no one on earth who can share your joy—realize that God is by your side, ready to walk with you through all of it.