Learning to Love

Notes
Transcript
Handout
Happy Valentines day. This is a day when we pause to celebrate love.
John 13:34–35 NLT
34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
The disciples had been told to love others before but now Jesus tells them to love in a different manner. He told them to love others as Jesus loved them. That’s different. You don’t need a bumper sticker, or a tattoo, or a pin on your jacket, or a cross around your neck.
People will know we belong to Jesus because we love each other
A couple of hundred years ago, Encyclopedia tried to explain love. The article was 5 pages long and they described the Atom in 4 lines. Years later, they left out love completely and took 5 pages to describe the atom.
That shows the problem we live in today. Jesus said in Matt 24:12
Matthew 24:12 NLT
12 Sin will be rampant everywhere, and the love of many will grow cold.
We live in a day of rampant sin and dwindling love.
I don’t think anyone could argue about that today.
A psychiatrist said
More than anything else people need the ability to love and be loved.
We live in a sick and loveless world. All you have to do is look around. Love doesn’t necessarily make the world go around, but it makes the trip worthwhile. We need to love one another.
Love can be hard to explain or express… even romantic love. Think back to when you first fell in love. You had that quiver in your liver. Remember the first kiss? The chills ran down your back and back up again.
Someone once said that love is an inward expressibility of an outward all overishness. or that love is a feeling you get when you feel a feeling you have never felt before. It’s hard to express or explain.
That’s romantic love, but think about how difficult it is to express the love of God when Jesus says, John 13:34
John 13:34 NLT
34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.
But Jesus didn’t just give us this as a command, he gave us an example. He gave us an example of a love worth finding, a love worth sharing, and a love worth worth sending.
Jesus teaches us how to love.
In this chapter, Jesus gives us an example of love when he washed the disciples feet.
John 13:1–17 NLT
1 Before the Passover celebration, Jesus knew that his hour had come to leave this world and return to his Father. He had loved his disciples during his ministry on earth, and now he loved them to the very end. 2 It was time for supper, and the devil had already prompted Judas, son of Simon Iscariot, to betray Jesus. 3 Jesus knew that the Father had given him authority over everything and that he had come from God and would return to God. 4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, 5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him. 6 When Jesus came to Simon Peter, Peter said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” 7 Jesus replied, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will.” 8 “No,” Peter protested, “you will never ever wash my feet!” Jesus replied, “Unless I wash you, you won’t belong to me.” 9 Simon Peter exclaimed, “Then wash my hands and head as well, Lord, not just my feet!” 10 Jesus replied, “A person who has bathed all over does not need to wash, except for the feet, to be entirely clean. And you disciples are clean, but not all of you.” 11 For Jesus knew who would betray him. That is what he meant when he said, “Not all of you are clean.” 12 After washing their feet, he put on his robe again and sat down and asked, “Do you understand what I was doing? 13 You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are right, because that’s what I am. 14 And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. 15 I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you. 16 I tell you the truth, slaves are not greater than their master. Nor is the messenger more important than the one who sends the message. 17 Now that you know these things, God will bless you for doing them.
If you want to be happy? If you want to love and be loved? Pay attention to what Jesus is saying and doing in this passage because if you know this, and if you do this, that is the way to find joy.
There are 4 things here that Jesus practiced about love. The bible says that he loved us right up until the end of his time on earth and he is still loving us. Then he gave us the command to love others as he loved us.
Sandwiched in this passage is the example of love that Jesus gave us when he washed the feet of the disciples.

1. Real love is selfless love.

John 13:4–5 NLT
4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, 5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him.
In Bible times, they used to do something called foot washing. I have been at a church service where they did this, and it’s gross. Back then they wore sandals and the streets were dusty and nasty and their feet would get dirty.
When you would go to someone’s home, there would be a servant there who would wash your feet. Imagine, a foot washing and massage. WOW.
But in this instance, there was no servant there to wash their feet and the disciples were not even thinking about washing each other’s feet. They were arguing about who was going to be the greatest. Jesus however after supper, washed their feet.
John 13:4 NLT
4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist,
The towel was actually an apron that the servant would wear who washed the guests feet. The word actually means, apron of a slave.
Think about it. The disciples were arguing over who would be the greatest, and here the greatest, Jesus, was washing their feet.
Notice it says he took off his robe. Some translations say that he laid aside his robe. This is a picture of the Lord coming to earth and laying aside his glory and power. Paul referred to this in Phil 2:5-8
Philippians 2:5–8 NLT
5 You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. 6 Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. 7 Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, 8 he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.
Paul said Jesus gave up is divine privileges. He laid them aside. It’s the same. He took off his divine power and privilege. He laid aside his deity, his glory, his power… all the spender and majesty. He laid all that aside to come to earth to serve us. He didn’t come to be served, but to serve. Matt 20:28
Matthew 20:28 NLT
28 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
That’s what we are talking about. Selfless love. That’s opposite fo what our culture says. Culture says it’s all about me. Look at all the books that are about self-fulfillment… self glory… None of that came from Jesus. Jesus said that we are to take up our cross and follow him daily.
Here is something about humility. You can’t have genuine love without humility. The Bible describes this in 1 CO 13:5
1 Corinthians 13:5 NLT
5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
Real love is humble. Real humility doesn’t demand it’s on way. It also doesn’t go around saying “I’m no good.” If you think that, you are dead wrong. Real humility is realizing that you are special because God made you. For you to go around saying I am no good is a slap in the face of God who created you.
You need to understand who you are in Christ. Who are you?
You are a child of God.
Notice what this passage says. John 13:3-5
John 13:3–5 NLT
3 Jesus knew that the Father had given him authority over everything and that he had come from God and would return to God. 4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, 5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him.
You can’t have true humility until you know who you are. Jesus knew who he was. He took off his garments and humbled himself.
We don’t need to think less or too much of ourselves.
Romans 12:3 NLT
3 Because of the privilege and authority God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us.
We need to look at ourselves realistically. We need to realize that we are who we are because of what He has done. When you know who you are in Christ, you do not have to be threatened to humble yourself and serve others. Write this down.
Real humility is understanding who you are in Christ and therefore being free to serve one another.
John 13:3 NLT
3 Jesus knew that the Father had given him authority over everything and that he had come from God and would return to God.
Ephesians 1:6 NLT
6 So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son.
We belong to Jesus, God’s son because of the GRACE that God poured out on us. When we realize this, we have peace inside, with God and others.
Think about it. As long as you feel threatened by someone, you can’t really accept them and will attempt to manipulate them instead of humbling yourself around them.
Jesus knew who he was and was free to serve the disciples. Jesus knew he came from God and was returning to God. He knew that he voluntarily laid aside his power and glory. And then he washed the disciples feet.
Do you know people who are not free to love? to really love? Why are they unable to love? They are insecure in who they are in Christ. They have not discovered the riches of knowing the Lord Jesus.
When you understand who you are in Christ, then you have to love because you have nothing to lose.
So real love is a selfless love.

2. Real love is steadfast love.

Look at this text again. John 13:1
John 13:1 NLT
1 Before the Passover celebration, Jesus knew that his hour had come to leave this world and return to his Father. He had loved his disciples during his ministry on earth, and now he loved them to the very end.
Now understand. Jesus is about to be arrested and crucified. He has more important things on his mind than washing the disciples dirty feet. But John 13:3
John 13:3 NLT
3 Jesus knew that the Father had given him authority over everything and that he had come from God and would return to God.
He knew everything that was fixing to happen. He knew he was fixing to be arrested, tried and crucified. But knowing this, He got up and put on a slaves’ apron and washed their feet.
So, the second thing is that real love is a steadfast love. It’s easy to love someone when things are all good. But look who all Jesus was loving. He was loving Judas who went and betrayed him. He was loving the disciples who all ran when they came to grab him.
The Bible says that Satan entered into the heart of Judas causing him to betray him. Do you know what Jesus did? He washed his feet.
He loved them with a steadfast love. None of them deserved it. But he kept on loving them and washed their feet. Now, these disciples, who Jesus was washing their feet had been argueing about who would be the greatest. Jesus just kept on loving them.
His love was steadfast. Do you have that kind of love? Do you have the kind of love that does not change due to circumstances?
So many times we try to excuse ourselves right? We say stuff like, I have a headache, I’m tired. I’m been sick or that I have been under pressure. Listen, no one was under more pressure than Jesus was the night before His Crucifixion. But he was still loving.
If you want to know what you are full of, just look at what spills out under pressure. No one was under more pressure than Jesus, but he kept on loving. Here is what that tells me.
Romans 8:38–39 NLT
38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Add this to John when he said that Jesus loved them to the end. That tells me that God’s perfect love never stops. It always is giving.

3. Real love is serving love.

Love is not only selfless and steadfast. Real love is a serving love.
John 13:5 NLT
5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him.
Jesus didn’t talk about love, he demonstrated it. He actually showed love. The Bible says in 1 John 3:18
1 John 3:18 NLT
18 Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.
Jesus showed love by his actions. It has to go past our minds and our notes. It has to get into us so that it comes out in actions.
Jesus gave his disciples what they needed in that moment. They needed to be renewed, refreshed, restored, revived, and reinvigorated. That’s what they needed.
Here is what real love does.
Real love gives others what they need, not what they want.
What we need is not always what we want and what we want is not always what we need. My dad would say, you need a spanking. Most of the time, well all of the time, he was right, but I didn’t want one.
If you love me, you won’t give me what I want, nor will you give me what I deserve. You will give me what I need.
The disciples didn’t deserve to have their feet washed. They were arguing over who was going to be the greatest. Jesus didn’t give them what they deserved or what they wanted, He gave them what they needed… a lesson in love and humility. That’s what love does.
Jack Hyles - ate at a restaurant. Had a rude waitress. tipped he big and left after eating. She caught him and said, you left your money on the table. He said it was her tip. She asked why he would tip her like that when she had been rude. He replied that he looked past her rudeness and saw the pain she was in. She broke down, and told him her story. He ended up leading her to faith in Christ and getting her help.
Real love doesn’t give people what they want or deserve, it gives them what they need. The disciples did not deserve to have the king of the universe washing their feet, but He knew what they needed.
It was a small thing. Jesus did what only a slave was supposed to do. It might seem insignificant but it wasn’t. We have lots of jobs like that here at the church. Children’s workers, tech crew, ushers, greeters, clean up folks, faithful feeders Not everything is glamorous but everything is important.
Real love gives people what they need.

4. Real love is a sanctifying love

John 13:6 NLT
6 When Jesus came to Simon Peter, Peter said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?”
Jesus answered him saying,
John 13:7 NLT
7 Jesus replied, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will.”
IOW, Peter there is something here that you don’t understand, but you will. Then Peter said, in John 13:8
John 13:8 NLT
8 “No,” Peter protested, “you will never ever wash my feet!” Jesus replied, “Unless I wash you, you won’t belong to me.”
He said that unless he washed his feet, he did not belong to Jesus. Look at Peter’s response.
John 13:9–11 NLT
9 Simon Peter exclaimed, “Then wash my hands and head as well, Lord, not just my feet!” 10 Jesus replied, “A person who has bathed all over does not need to wash, except for the feet, to be entirely clean. And you disciples are clean, but not all of you.” 11 For Jesus knew who would betray him. That is what he meant when he said, “Not all of you are clean.”
So what is Jesus talking about? He’s not talking about dirty feet anymore. Now he is talking about spiritual dirt. Now he is talking about forgiveness when he said you don’t understand what I am talking about now, but you will.
When a person has a bath, they are clean. When a person gets saved, they are cleansed from their sins. But just like a person who has had a bath goes out and walks through dusty roads, and get their feet dirty. Those of us who have been saved, still live in a world that’s polluted with sin and our spiritual feet get dirty again. When this happens, we don’t need to get bathed again, we need to get our spiritual feet cleaned.
Every day we need to come to the Lord and let him renew us, refresh us, restore us, and reinvigorate us. We need to coem to him for spiritual foot washing. Jesus is talking about forgiveness of our daily sin that we come to him and confess to him and he forgives that sin. This keeps us in fellowship with Him.
Jesus’ love is a sanctifying love and our love is to be a sanctifying love.
What does that mean? We are to wash each other’s feet.
John 13:14 NLT
14 And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet.
IOW, if he forgives us, we are to forgive each other. He forgives me and I am to forgive you. Look at what Paul said in Eph 4:32
Ephesians 4:32 NLT
32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Kind to each other, tenderhearted and forgiving each other. Why? Because Jesus forgave us.
We wash someone else’s feet when we are kind, tenderheated and forgiving towards them.
Not only are we to forgive, but we are to help keep each other on the right path. And we do that with humility so that we don’t fall into the same trap.
Galatians 6:1 NLT
1 Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
If someone has wandered off track, they don’t need a lecture, they need to be lovingly lead back on track. They need restoration. Jesus is washing Judas feet and he is about to betray Jesus. Jesus is restoring and refreshing them and renewing them.
We wash someone else’s feet when we help them get back on the right path.
Now, since Jesus is doing that for us, don’t you think we ought to do that for each other? That’s what real love does. Real love is a sanctifying love and it loves them into fellowship with the Lord and each other.
Conclusion
I want you to imagine with me for a few minutes. Imagine that Jesus just walked into the room. I mean in a physical body. And he is walking up that aisle and he has a towel wrapped around his waist and a basin of water in his hands.
Imagine that Jesus stops in front of you and asks you, “May I wash your feet? How would you feel? I mean to have the Lord of the universe, the one who died for you, ask you that question; May I wash your feet?
Maybe you would be like Peter and say no at first. Then with tears and with love you cannot express you would say, Yes Lord wash my feet.
Can you imagine with me that he is taking your shoes off with those nail pierced hands and he is bathing and massaging your feet this morning? How would that feel? And then imagine that when he is finished. He looks into your eyes and asks, Now will you wash my feet? What would you say? yes Lord, I’ll wash your feet and you wash those nail pierced feet that walked this earth and never committed a sin.
Now, lay your imagination down because Jesus is here this evening. And he wants to wash your feet.
Are you willing to let him? Are you willing to let him cleanse you and forgive you of every sin and restore you, renew you, and refresh you?
Let me ask another question. Are you willing to wash his feet this morning? You say, how can we do that? He isn’t physically in this room. Let me tell you something. Jesus said,
Matthew 25:40 NLT
40 “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’
Don’t tell me that you would want to wash the feet of Jesus if you don’t want to wash the feet of the person next to you. You may say, they don’t deserve it. That may be true. But we are talking about love, real love and real love will wash their feet.
Is there anyone you are holding a grudge against? Is there anyone who has done you wrong?
Are you willing to kneel before them and say, I want to refresh you and restore you. I want to wash your feet, I want to love you and forgive you just like God through Jesus forgave me.
Jesus said,
John 13:14 NLT
14 And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet.
John 13:34 NLT
34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.
That’s a love worth finding. A love worth sharing. That’s a love worth sending.
Prayer.
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