Feelings….
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https://www.str.org/w/loving-someone-doesn-t-mean-accepting-their-behavior
Romans 1:18-32 is a very sobering passage. The NIV Bible titles it “God’s Wrath Against Sinful Humanity.” The verses list an abundance of sins that provoke God’s anger. The list includes everything from sexual impurity and idolatry to arrogance and hatred. The stern passage concludes with this warning, “Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them” (Romans 1:32; emphasis added).
When Jesus began His ministry, His first recorded words were, “’The kingdom of God has come near. Repent and believe the good news!’” (Mark 1:15). He also warned, “…unless you repent, you too will all perish” (Luke 13:3).
The Jesus of the Bible was “…full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). He was compassionate to the sinful woman at the well (See John 4) yet confronted her with the truth of her sin. “The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true” (John 4:18). In Matthew 10:21 Jesus reminded the Rich Young Ruler there was one thing he lacked, demanding him to “…go and sell all you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” And in John 8:11 Jesus forgave a woman caught in adultery but then added, “…‘Go now and leave your life of sin.’”
Acts 2 records that on the Day of Pentecost Simon Peter boldly confronted the audience, charging they had murdered the Messiah whom God then raised from the dead. Simon Peter was not being judgmental or self-righteous. He was stating facts his audience desperately needed to hear. “When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, ‘Brothers, what shall we do?’” (Act 2:37). Peter did not tell them to just celebrate the fact that God loves them as they are and receive His grace. No, instead “Peter replied, ‘Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit’” (Acts 2:38).Notice, Christ-followers are challenged not only to resist evil desires, but we are admonished not to give approval to those who indulge in depravity. If a despondent man is standing on the roof of a high building threatening suicide, it’s sick for the crowd below to cheer him on or encourage him to follow through and jump. “Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.” (1 Corinthians 13:6)“It is Christ who is to be exalted, not our feelings. We will know Him by obedience, not by emotions. Our love will be shown by obedience, not by how good we feel about God at a given moment. And love means following the commands of God. ‘Do you love Me?’ Jesus asked Peter. ‘Feed My lambs.’ He was not asking, ‘How do you feel about Me?’ for love is not a feeling. He was asking for action.” Elisabeth ElliotThe Christian life is meant to be based on faith, not on feelings. Followers of Jesus are to seek to know and understand God and what he desires of us and then act upon that. Thus we are to use our minds to read and study God’s Word and use our wills to obey it.I have in my possession a Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance. It lists every use of every word in the Bible. The word “faith” and others related to it occur many hundreds of times throughout Scripture. On the other hand, the word “feel” is used in Scripture only nineteen times, and of those only two are in the New Testament. There are three related uses of the word: feeling, feelings, feels. Only seven verses in the Bible contain these words, and of those, only one is in the New Testament.
“There is nothing so deluding as feelings. Christians cannot live by feelings. Let me further tell you that these feelings are the work of Satan, for they are not right feelings. What right have you to set up your feelings against the Word of Christ.” Charles SpurgeonThere’s a huge imbalance here. If you were to search the New Testament-in which the Holy Spirit is seen to be given to the Church-you will find no occasion on which apostles or disciples observe or speak of their emotions or feelings as a gauge of their experience with God. When we’re told in Scripture to have joy in the Lord, it isn’t to be gained by rolling on the floor or by straining to gain emotional feelings or experiences. It’s all about faith. Without faith it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6). Feelings are not mentioned as a goal or an imperitive.
19 Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. 20 But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Php 3:19–21.
Have your emotions become your God? That means we can start to worship them, obey them, and rely on them in ways we really shouldn’t.
The seed cast in the gravel—this is the person who hears and instantly responds with enthusiasm. But there is no soil of character, and so when the emotions wear off and some difficulty arrives, there is nothing to show for it.
Matthew 13:20-21 MSG
The beloved man of faith, Smith Wigglesworth, once said, “I can’t understand God by feelings. I can’t understand the Lord Jesus Christ by feelings. I can only understand God the Father and Jesus Christ by what the Word says about them. God is everything the Word says He is. We need to get acquainted with Him through the Word.” Too many people try to get acquainted with God through their personal feelings. When they feel good, they think God has heard their prayers. If they don’t feel particularly good they think He has not heard them. Their faith is based on their feelings whereas it should be based on God’s word.
John 20:24-29
24 But Thomas, one of the twelve, called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came. 25 The other disciples therefore said unto him, We have seen the Lord. But he said unto them, Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe. 26 And after eight days again his disciples were within, and Thomas with them; then came Jesus, the doors being shut, and stood in the midst, and said, Peace be unto you. 27 Then saith he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side; and be not faithless, but believing. 28 And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God. 29 Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.
Thomas was one who based his faith upon his feelings, upon what his physical senses told him. He said that he would not believe unless he could see with his own eyes the prints of the nails in Jesus’ hands, and touch these nail prints with his own hands. He relied on what he could see and touch, not on what God had to say. We have so many “Thomas Christian” today – those who believe only what they feel, believe only what they can see, hear, or touch. But real faith in God is based upon the Word of God. Real faith in the Word says, “If God says it is true, it is.” Believing God is believing His Word.
What exactly is faith?
“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” {Hebrews 11:1}
Think about Hebrews 11:1 like this: faith = trusting & treasuring. Having faith means trusting that God is who He says He is and will do what He has promised He will do. And because we trust Him who is eternally glorious, we treasure Him above everything else.
As Jesus entered Mary and Martha’s home and began to teach, Mary immediately plopped down at his feet. Martha, on the other hand, set straight to work. She probably wanted to make sure her house was spotless, prepare her best food, and get out her finest dishes. But in the midst of trying to give Jesus her best, she got trampled under the weight of feeling like she needed to be perfect. She became frustrated that her sister was sitting and not helping. She became jealous that Mary was getting all of Jesus’ attention. She grew anxious that all of the work wouldn’t get done in time.
But Martha didn’t realize what was really happening inside herself. Her attention to detail turned into anxiety. Her consideration of Jesus developed into criticism of Mary. Her tender heart morphed into a troubled mind. And Serving-Martha became Sulking-Martha.
Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her to help me.”
But Jesus said, “Martha, Martha…Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”
You see, while Martha was wrapped up in her emotions of perfectionism and pessimism, Mary was focusing on the teachings of Christ. While Martha chose to listen to her negative thoughts, Mary chose to listen to the words of the King. Martha chose feelings. Mary chose Jesus. And Jesus tells us that what Mary chose is better.
http://www.thetransformedsoul.com/additional-studies/spiritual-life-studies/feelings-emotions-amp-faith
A biblical psychology of emotion must begin and end with God, because He is the Eternal One who created us in “His image.” Dr. John Frame, a professor of theology at Reformed Theological Seminary, aptly states in his book “The Doctrine of the Know-ledge of God” (P & R, 1987, p. 10) — “we cannot know other things rightly without knowing God rightly, essentially because the doctrine of the knowledge of God implies a doctrine of the knowledge of everything.” John Calvin (1509-1564), the French theologian and reformer begins in his work on the “Institutes of the Christian Religion” with a similar acknowledgement: “the knowledge of ourselves is inextricably dependent upon our knowledge of God, and vice-versa” (Eeerdmans, 1997, pp. 37-39). Incidentally, wisdom and knowledge about anything also begins with a particular emotional attitude toward God: “the fear of the Lord” (cf. Prv 1:76; 9:10). Throughout Scripture God is portrayed in personal terms because He is a “person.” Alvin Plantinga, a Professor of Philosophy Emeritus at the University of Notre Dame, states in his book “Body & Soul” (Intervarsity, 2000, p. 25), “The assertion that the God of the Bible experiences emotion would seem to go without saying, were it not for the early influence of Plato and the Stoics upon theologians. The contrivance of an impassible, unemotional God stems from a pejorative view of emotions as inherently unruly & capricious (that was ancient Greek thinking). The emotions were viewed as irrational and intemperate and as a sign of weakness, dependence, and contingency. As a result, the Stoic ideal of apatheia became the ideal and this idea was imposed upon God.” The renowned Professor of Theology & Science at the University of Oxford in England, Dr. Alister McGrath, stated it this way in his book “Historical Theology” — “In order to preserve the divine attributes of transcendence, immutability, and aseity many of the patristic theologians believed it logically necessary to posit that God is impassible; i.e., He is incapable of experiencing passions, negative emotions or suffering…. [though Scripture ascribes emotion to God, these men simply held that] God merely represented Himself with emotion in order to communicate meaningfully to emotional human beings” (Oxford, Blackwell, 1998, p. 15). If you think this is a bit much, “The thirty-Nine Articles of the Church of England” & “The Westminster Confession of Faith” described God as “without body, part, or passions.” The Professor of Theology at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, Dr. D. A. Caron, says in his book “How Long O Lord?” — “[The method used to buy into the doctrine of Divine impassibility was that of] selecting certain texts of Scripture, namely those that insist on God’s sovereignty and changelessness, constructs a theological grid on the basis of those selected texts, and then uses this grid to filter out all other texts; in particular those that speak of God’s emotions” (Baker, 1990, p. 186). As Dr. Paul Fiddes, a Professor of Systematic Theology at the University of Oxford in England asserts in his work “Divine Suffering” — “nearly all Christian theologians today acknowledge that God indeed does experience emotion” (Blackwell, 1993, p. 634).
Understanding God’s design and order for emotion is an essential prerequisite for understanding “disordered emotions.” Unfortunately, much of our thinking about emotion and its proper place in our lives is derived from our experience with our “fallen emotions” — it is here where secular mental health professionals fail to emotional problems… because they are in the wilderness when it comes to man’s fallenness; as such, they ignore God’s recipe for emotional well-being. It goes without saying that a prerequisite for “defining a disorder” is a prior apprehension of “the proper order” — in order to understand what is disordered, one must first understand the right or ideal order. For example, from a biblical perspective, a person who experiences no fear of God and no anxiety about their eternal destiny is more disordered than a person who has panic attacks subsequent to conviction that they are guilty before a Holy and Just God and bound for hell outside of Christ. As Sam Williams states, “When emotions are isolated from the one with whom we have to do, they are misinterpreted [and wrongly dealt with] — medicated and falsely assuaged.” A major problem with many Christian counselors is that they often focus on “healing emotions” rather than “addressing the heart” which produces the emotion. The biblical diagnosis is not that we have wounded or damaged emotions, it is that we have “me problems.” According to Scripture, our hearts are disordered and are full of evil (cf. Ecc 9:3; Jer 17:9; Ps 51:10). One of the premiere voices on “Christian Counseling,” Dr. Jay Adams, states, “The fact is that there are no damaging or destructive emotions per se. Our emotional makeup is totally from God. All emotions of which He made us capable are constructive when used properly (i.e., in accordance with biblical principles)… All emotions, however, can become destructive when we fail to express them in harmony with biblical limitations and structures” (The Christian Counselor’s Manual, Zondervan, 1973, p. 349).
As Dr. Sam Williams states, “This is where the rub lies.” A biblical view of emotion, while maintaining that the capacity for emotion is good, must account for sin. The fallen human heart is evil, deceptive, and rebellious; therefore, its products are tainted with the stain of sin. Sin infects our whole being and every capacity or faculty has been tilted away from God. Our emotions are no longer naturally oriented in such a way that they contribute to honoring, loving, and obeying God. Instead, our emotions have become self-serving, our affections idolatrous, and our passion is for our own glory rather than God’s. We tend to seek happiness in what cannot last, delight in evil, fear that which God forbids, become angry when we should be patient, grieve hopelessly, and hate that which is good. Holistic depravity means that we not only choose and think the wrong things, but that our emotions, but for grace, are wrongly oriented. Fallen emotions appear very quickly in human history — not long after creation, Adam and Eve’s emotions are incited and directed against God rather than for Him. Satan’s lie was big enough to reinterpret their life, and dynamic enough to redirect the flow of their affection — to be as God is a very intoxicating construct of thought… by embracing that didactic Adam and Eve ultimately became ashamed, worried, anxious and fearful… and soon after that, the first murder was committed in a context of ungodly emotion (Cain’s sinful envy of Abel and unrighteous anger). A biblical view of emotion must reckon with the fall and the pervasive effects of sin upon the whole of man (body and soul). Our emotions, intended to function in concert with all of other faculties for the glory of God, fall short because of sin.
Fortunately, the fall is not the end of our story. Because of God’s grace and His redemp-tive purposes realized in Christ, the pervasive effects of sin upon the image of God in man are not irreversible. Though each and every one of our capacities or faculties has been corrupted, likewise they can be restored. As Sam Williams says, in Christ we find hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge and truth (Cf. Col 2:3; 3:10; Eph 4:21), thus the good of reason is restored. In Christ our conscience is renewed (cf. Heb 5:11-14; 9:8-14; 10:22; 1 Pet 3:21). In Christ we are empowered to choose that which is good (cf. Eph 2:10; Titus 2:14; 3:18; Heb 9:14), because our volition is renewed. In Christ our emotions and affections become allies in loving God and others; they have been redeemed (cf. Phil 1:7-8; 2:1-5; Col 3:5- 12; 1 Th2:7-8). In addition, Jesus Christ can restore the harmonious interaction of reason, conscience, volition and emotion, which disintegrated in the fall. God’s Word and the Holy Spirit address the whole man so that the intellect is challenged to think truly, the emotions are kindled toward God, and the will is stimulated to act in ways that please God — remember, “those in Christ are new creatures; old things have passed away… new things have come” (2 Cor 5:17). Writes the reformed theologian John Frame, “It is best to think of intellect, will, and emotions as interdependent; each affects the others, and none can function properly apart from the others — when we try to employ one without the others, the result is distorted understanding, choices, and feelings” (Worship in Spirit and Truth; P & R, 1996, p. 78). Sometime, Frame says, “reason saves us from emotional craziness… but the goal is a satisfying analysis that we actually feel good about” (The Doctrine of the Knowledge of God, P & R, 1987, p. 336).