Praying for Others

made with Proclaim

Anthony Gentle

Tanilba Bay Baptist Church

Praying with Paul • Sermon • Submitted 2 months ago • Presented 2 months ago • 24:53

1 Thessalonians 3:9–13

Love

Prayer

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Shopping Lists

I’ve often found it strange that when I walk around a supermarket holding a shopping list, I have on occasion had people remark - oh, a shopping list, now that’s a good idea.

I’m usually thinking the comments are said a bit tongue-in-cheek, probably because they keep forgetting to write stuff down themselves.

But of course taking a shopping list is a good idea. I’m not even necessarily a list kind of a guy, but even I know it’s the best way to get what you need, and try and avoid buying the things you don’t.

It can backfire however, particularly if someone else has written the list.

I remember some time ago now, Fiona was doing some cooking and she needed some coconut for her recipe. I should add, she wanted desiccated coconut, but she didn’t write that. She just wrote coconut.

Well, I had the list, and I was trying to get the things on it relatively quickly, and so I go and buy a coconut. And I mean, an actual coconut, with the hard brown shell and all.

I bring the shopping home, Fiona pulls out this coconut, and asks - what is this for?

I did think, maybe I could try and grate the white fleshy part of the coconut - and someone might be able to tell me where I went wrong, but it did not work.

You see, the thing with lists are they are just words on a paper. They are words that jog our memory about what we should be doing.

They’re very useful, but they can quickly become detached if you’re not careful.

Shopping list prayers

From time-to-time, I’ve heard the phrase “shopping list prayers” being used.

What I’m talking about, is the writing of a big long list of things that you are praying for, and then going through the list. You might have your uncles surgery, your friends job opportunity, your sisters relationship problems, your cousins financial problems, your next door neighbours cancer diagnosis, your work colleagues custody issues… and the list goes on.

You sit down with the list in front of you, and you systematically go through the list.

Now if you do that - don’t stop. We’re told to bring our prayers requests before God, and just like writing a shopping list when you go to the shops so you don’t forget anything, writing a lists for your prayers is a fantastic idea.

I do however want to challenge you somewhat.

You see, a downside to the shopping list prayer approach, is that it can become very dispassionate. The list can become words on a page. Our prayers can become a routine of going through the motions.

Now, before I continue, let me just state something up front… God isn’t judging how polished our prayers are and then answering your prayers only if it’s good enough. God can answer some very simple and even awkwardly given prayers.

So I’m not trying to suggest that the issue is your prayers are going stale and therefore God won’t listen anymore.

In fact, this whole way of thinking, I believe, misses the point of prayer.

Interaction or Partnership

You see, we can sometimes picture prayer as a mechanism for getting things done. Almost like a transaction. You do your bit, that is, say the words… and God does his bit, that is, perform whatever task that has been asked for.

What if instead, we saw prayer as a partnership. We interact with God and we become part of a divine process whereby we witness God’s kingdom growing here on Earth.

Shifting from thinking of prayer as a transaction to prayer as part of a partnership, can help us to see where things can start to go astray with the shopping list approach to prayer. You see, we can think, I just need to say the words, then God will answer. Almost like the Buddhist spinning a prayer wheel.

So how do we avoid this?

Well, this series is about lessons on praying with Paul, and when we look at the prayers Paul prays, it’s a long way from this transactional way of praying.

And I’ll state up front why I say this - it’s because you can tell through his prayers that he has a genuine love for the people he prays for.

In fact throughout all of the letters Paul writes, he is constantly praying for other people. Sometimes the prayer is written out for us, some times he just tells us what he is praying about, but all of the time, the prayer is just oozing with love for them.

And so this is the big idea I want you to take from today’s message - when you pray for others, it should come from a deep love for them, a love that originated from God, and through the mysterious interaction of prayer becomes a deep love for them.

I could have chosen any number of Paul’s prayers and we could have demonstrated this, but today, I thought we’d focus on a prayer we find in 1 Thess 3.

Thessalonian context

Now last week, we were in 2 Thessalonians, so I gave a bit of the context there. So just briefly, Thessalonica was a city that Paul visited on his second missionary journey. He stayed for some time, seeing a number of people coming to Christ, before the Jews became so annoyed with him that they stirred up a mob and effectively chased Paul out of town.

Now as you read through this first letter, which is believed to have been written only a short time after the time Paul was there, you see the love and care that he has for these people.

You know, we can sometimes get the wrong impression about Paul. He can sometimes come across as someone who is arrogant and proud. We could almost get the impression that the churches he set up are like trophies. Except, when you actually look at the evidence… when you closely look at the way he speaks to the people, both in the letters that he writes, and the account that Luke gives for us in the book of Acts, these churches are far from trophies for him.

On the contrary, they are evidence of a God on the move. They are individuals that are loved by God, and therefore loved by Paul.

In chapter 1, just look at verses 4 and 5. It says: 1 Thessalonians 1:4–5 “For we know, brothers and sisters loved by God, that he has chosen you, because our gospel came to you not simply with words but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake.”

Paul goes on to almost reminisce about the way God moved through Paul and through these people to achieve something which was quite literally, out of this world.

In the second chapter, you start to get a sense of the love that Paul has for these people. He says in verse 7 and 8 (of chapter 2), “Just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well”.

You could keep reading this chapter and see the really deep concern that Paul has.

As we get to the start of the third chapter, you get the sense that this deep concern for these people just continues to weight on his heart. He starts this chapter with the words: “So when we could stand it no longer...”

This burning love just keeps stirring inside him, so much so, that he sends one of his closest workers, the young Timothy, to go up and be with them.

It’s perhaps worth noting at this point, that this expression of love is not mere empty sentiment, you know, the type that is meant to express sincerity, but in reality its more about making yourself look good, rather it is an expression of love that is accompanied by action.

Well, Timothy has been with them, and then in verse 6 of chapter 3, we read that he has now just come back with the report.

And it’s a good one!

How to express love

Okay, well lets take stock for a moment.

You see, what we are witnessing when we read through this letter is Christian love being expressed and we’re about to see how it is so thoroughly entwined with prayer.

So what do we learn from Paul about the way this love is expressed?

Intense longing

Well, firstly, as I’ve already looked at, there is an intense longing. It’s not mere platitudes. It’s an intense longing that resulted in action.

But there is something about this intense longing that is worth noting. You see, sometimes when we have an intense longing, it’s actually more about meeting our own desires.

We desire, because we’re lonely. We desire, because we need validation.

Now, while I don’t pretend to know all of the inner thinking of Paul, and I’m not going to suggest he never had any selfish desires, what we do see, however, is that the joy he feels, is because of the growth he is seeing in them. He’s getting satisfaction because they are standing firm in the Lord (v8).

If we are to model our love on the love of the Father, then it has to be a love that is focused on the other, not focused on what we get.

This is actually one of the main things that separates the love of the Father, with the love we see in the world. The love in the world is so often dependent on whether you’re getting something in return. Sadly, it’s why many marriages fail. One partner feels that it’s just not working for them any more, and so it ends.

Imagine if someone says, even though I’m not feeling fulfilled, I’m going to choose to love anyway. Now we’re starting to get closer to the love of the father.

Paul’s love for these Thessalonian believers, is not based on what they can give him, it’s based on their connection in Christ.

Thankfulness to God

The love is also expressed by thankfulness - but a thankfulness that is specifically pointed at God.

You see, this is the great thing about the loving people God’s way… ultimately, it brings us back to God.

When we love people the way God loves them, we see them for who they are - and who are they? They are children of God. They are people who are being transformed by God.

Too often we look at people through a lens we create ourselves. Its a lens which asks the question, what use is this person to me or my concerns?

But you can see in verse 9, a thankfulness that is about the presence of God.

Wrapped in prayer

It’s verse 10 where this all starts to get wrapped up in prayer.

Night and day, Paul says, they are praying most earnestly that they can be reunited and with their faith increasing as a result.

I just think this is a beautiful expression of love.

But the fact that prayer is mentioned in this verse is no mere turn of phrase.

You see, prayer is where the action happens. In prayer, Paul is connecting with God, and with his connection with God, he is connecting with these people.

Yes, he is praying that they may physically see each other, but yet, the prayer is essentially seeing a connection being made already.

Prayer in action

From verse 11, Paul is actually writing out his prayer for these people.

Now remember I stated before that we often see prayer as a transactional process, that is, we say something - God acts.

But I was suggesting that perhaps a better view would be to see prayer as a partnership with God. It’s interacting in a supernatural way with God.

This happens when we love God and love others. Prayer essentially becomes the outworking of that love.

Rather than just listing the needs of these people, the love for these people dominates the prayer.

You see this in verse 11 where he asks that the Lord Jesus may clear a way that they may go to them.

In verse 12, the pray asks that love may increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else.

It’s also worth noting that verse 13 has an end times angle to the prayer as well. He prays that their hearts may be strengthened so that they may be blameless and holy on that day when Jesus returns.

It’s the ultimate prayer… that they may share eternity with each other.

Application

So what do we learn from all of this, particular as we think about how we should pray for one another.

First of all, don’t over think it.

I’m actually not trying to provide a big long list of what you can and can’t do while you’re praying for others.

The simple thing is this - love the people you are praying for!

Do you remember the problem I had with the shopping list that I spoke about in my introduction - you know, when I bought a whole coconut rather than what was wanted.

The problem was I was disconnected. I was not invested in the whole situation.

Now, here’s the thing, people are going to ask you to pray for things, and the reality is, for many of these things, you’re actually not going to be invested in what you’re praying for.

By all means, still pray.

The crazy thing is, even though I’m trying to shift us away from thinking of prayer as a transaction, the reality is, God can and does still answer these prayers. Sometimes by praying in these situations, we’re actually involving ourselves in a groundswell of spiritual activity.

So please don’t hear me say that you can’t pray for someone if you are not fully invested in the whole situation.

However, what I will say is that as Christian, we should be actively working on developing a love for other people.

Not because we have to, but because God first loved us… because God has reached out to us, even when we didn’t deserve it, and he just loved us unconditionally.

For those of us who have experienced this, we should just naturally want to love others.

By all means write a list. Just like it makes sense to write a list when you go shopping, it makes sense to write a list for things to pray about.

But perhaps start by asking God, help me to love the people on this list like you love them. Ask God to help you to see the needs of these people beyond what might seem apparent.

It might be financial help, or a health issue, or relationship problems - but perhaps whats really needed is to see a God in front of them that just wants to love and help them.

And if I can give a note of warning on this topic. Sometimes, it can be easy to say, “I’ll pray for you”, but what you’re really saying is, I don’t actually want to help you, but I want to sound like a good Christian person.

If we’re going to practice love, then prayer and practical action will go hand in hand. There are some times when praying is all we can do, however, ask God whether there is anything practical you can do as well.

Conclusion

It’s a beautiful thing when God’s people pray for one another.

Because as we pray, we draw close to God, and we see things more clearly. As we draw close to God, we love more dearly.

Prayer is more than just a wish list. God is not just a genie in a bottle who will answer our wishes. He is the creator of this universe, a being that we can have a relationship with, who wants us to communicate with us, and in one of the greatest mysteries of all, he will listen to us.

So keep on praying.

Pray even when you don’t feel like praying. As it has been said before - pray until you pray.

Because it is in prayer that God will start to reveal himself, and we can truly love one another.