1 Timothy 5:1-16 - Caring for the Flock
Notes
Transcript
Handout
Introduction
The church is called to care for the entire flock.
Churches today seem to care a lot about children and their programming is oftentimes geared toward children and youth. It is absolutely imperative that we do care for the next generation and that our hearts should be set on training them well.
However, we must not miss the veterans, as I like to call them, as well. We must not miss those in our congregations that are older. We are commanded in today’s Scriptures to care for them as well - specifically we are commanded to care for the widows in our churches.
According to Census.gov, among those 75 years and older who have every married, 58% of women have experienced the death of a spouse in their lifetime (1).
This is a huge number of widows that need to be cared for.
Before getting into our Scripture today, let’s pray and ask the Lord to bless our time together.
Prayer
Today we are going to discuss four aspects of how the church must care for the flock. Our first point is…
I. The Church Must Communicate in Charity (1-2)
I. The Church Must Communicate in Charity (1-2)
Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity.
During these first two verses, Paul spends some time discussing communication in the church. We must remember that he is writing to Timothy and in these two verses he gives some charitable advice on how to clearly and gracefully communicate with the body of Christ.
The word for rebuke here is a harsh or sharp rebuke. It can also mean a violent rebuke. Although Timothy would need to correct false teaching and errant theology even amongst older men, he was to do it in gentleness and with encouragement. He was to lovingly confront older men in error. Leviticus 19:32 exemplifies this respect for older men as all were to honor them. In fact, this honor was to be given to the elders because of the fear of the Lord.
Paul doesn’t stop there though. He goes on to charge Timothy to encourage younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters. Note the familial terms here. Consider Ephesians 2:19 that refers to the household of God.
He was not to lord his authority over younger men. He was to treat them as brothers in Christ.
As to regard to older women, he was to honor them as he would his mother.
And finally, as to younger women, he was to treat them, in purity, as sisters in Christ.
Brothers and sisters, relationships within our church take tact, grace, and wisdom. We must understand the example we are given here from Paul to Timothy. These are principles that we all should follow in communicating with those in our churches. Sadly, our world has tried to blur the lines regarding gender and age.
The worldly false doctrine of sameness has led to the disrespect of elders and women especially.
We see this clearly on public transportation and in waiting rooms. Rarely do you see a young man stand up and give his seat to an older person or a lady. In fact, I have seen many times, a young man use his athleticism and abilities to try to beat someone else to a more comfortable spot. God is most certainly not pleased with such behavior and disrespect.
We also see it today in women’s sports where men, who are so-called transitioning, compete with their larger body and musculature and show no respect for women. There is no charity or kindness in this. Instead of desiring to be gracious and put others first, these young men are putting themselves and their own happiness before others.
We must be different as the church. We must communicate with one another with charity and with love and grace.
Next we see that…
Scripture References: Leviticus 19:32, Ephesians 2:19
II. The Church Must Be Characterized by Caring (3, 5-6, 9-10)
II. The Church Must Be Characterized by Caring (3, 5-6, 9-10)
1 Timothy 5:3, 5-6 (ESV)
Honor widows who are truly widows.... She who is truly a widow, left all alone, has set her hope on God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day, but she who is self-indulgent is dead even while she lives.
Now we come to the heart of this passage - caring for the widows. This is a command to the church - to honor those who are truly widows. What does it mean to be truly a widow? Paul gives some criteria here:
A true widow requiring the care of the church…
1. Is left all alone with no family to care for them.
2. Has her hope set on God.
3. Is a woman of prayer.
4. Is not self-indulgent and faithless
The church is to care for widows in need. This first qualification points to the next point which describes the need for family to care for widows first and foremost. We will get into that more in a moment.
However, these widows listed here should be faithful followers of Christ who are fervent in prayer. Their hope is founded upon God.
Why is there such a focus on widows in this chapter? Because God has always been a defender of the widows. See Deuteronomy 10:18:
Deuteronomy 10:18a (ESV)
He executes justice for the fatherless and the widow...
And in Deuteronomy 24:17:
“You shall not pervert the justice due to the sojourner or to the fatherless, or take a widow’s garment in pledge,
God has always been in the business of protecting and caring for widows. Women without a husband, especially in Biblical times, were at great risk of being destitute. Israel had been commanded to care for the widows, and this care for widows was continued in the New Testament church.
Paul then moves forward to discuss the enrollment or list of widows in verses 9-10…
Let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than sixty years of age, having been the wife of one husband, and having a reputation for good works: if she has brought up children, has shown hospitality, has washed the feet of the saints, has cared for the afflicted, and has devoted herself to every good work.
We are given another list of qualifications for widows that is more detailed than the last one we saw.
True Widows Should Be Enrolled If:
1. She is not less than sixty years of age.
2. She has been faithful to her husband (a one-man woman).
This doesn’t rule out a woman who has been widowed multiple times. It refers to her being faithful to her husband.
3. She has a reputation for good works.
4. She has brought up children.
This fourth qualification does not rule out widows who have been barren. It asserts that we should honor those who have cared for and reared children.
5. She has shown hospitality (Examples such as washing the feet of the saints and caring for the afflicted).
6. She has devoted herself to every good work.
This is quite a list of qualifications. There are some who believe that verses 9-10 referred to an order of widows that would assist the church. They point to Scriptures such as Dorcas and her widow friends as found in Acts 9:36-43. Although I think that widows who are able to serve the church are pivotal to the ministry of the church, there isn’t a clear official office or command for such given here. To make an office based on this would be to go well beyond the Scriptures. However, to form a group of widows who do service in the church based on these qualifications would certainly be a helpful thing for the church! I cannot think of any pastor who would not support that!
However, a church should clearly not use such a group as a type of forced work of widows. Widows who serve the church should do so freely and gracefully - not reluctantly or under compulsion. The apparent danger of taking this Scripture as an official group of widows supported by the church to serve the church is obvious.
The totality of what has been given so far points to honoring and caring for godly widows.
So, how does this practically look today in our culture? How do we apply these principles in our churches?
1. We must prioritize godly widows.
This does not mean that we do not care for widows who are not meeting these criteria. It means that those who have served the churches well should be cared for first and foremost.
Some of you might not like the way that sounds. Pastor Paul LeBoutillier from Calvary Chapel Ontario, Oregon gave a great reason why you might bristle when hearing prioritization of certain widows. He asserted that if you are bothered by that - it is probably because you have the spiritual gift of compassion and mercy. Those with that spiritual gift cannot think of anyone needing anything and not getting it. It is a beautiful gift. However, it is a gift that can make one not as fit for administration - a gift that Paul obviously had. When there are limited resources, an administrator must be able to ensure they are handled in a correct way. Those with the gift of mercy struggle with saying no - even when it might not be the right thing to do.
My wife has this gift of mercy. She has one of the biggest hearts I have ever seen. I am certain that if we only relied on her gift of mercy, we would have adopted 50 kids and probably 50 shelter dogs by now. We would probably have a nursery rhyme sang about us rivaling the old woman in the shoe. However, by God’s grace, He has given me the gift of administration. We are able to work together in harmony because of our unique gifts. As a side note - my wife and I often joke that because the two have become one - we are now just a half of a person.
This is one reason we are the body of Christ - one body and many parts. Each part has strengths and weaknesses. Because of this we are able to balance one another out!
2. We must provide for the needs of widows.
We live in a nation that has many resources for widows and those struggling. We should come alongside widows and help them get qualified for assistance and benefits that are available.
We then should do what we can to help fill the needs still arising in their lives. We should be willing to help with physical labor or covering things that they cannot afford or do themselves.
3. We must protect widows in the church.
We also must protect widows in the church from those who wish to do them harm. There are many out there who seek to take advantage of widows. They may try to financially scam them, seek to physically harm them, or worse. We need to do our best to offer help and protection.
Unfortunately, in the time of Christ, religious leaders could be the worst at scamming widows.
Mark 12:40 (ESV)
who devour widows’ houses and for a pretense make long prayers. They will receive the greater condemnation.”
When discussing the religious leaders of His day, Jesus condemned them for devouring widow’s houses. They would take advantage of widows and steal their money!
We must protect widows from charlatans that are out there today. There are false teachers out there robbing widows left and right through their false prosperity preaching on television - promising wealth or blessings for gifts given to their debased so-called ministries.
The care of widows is actually one of the areas that a deacon serves and helps in. We were blessed to ordain two new deacons at CrossPointe today. These two men are the point people for our mercy ministries at CrossPointe. Feel free to reach out them to discuss any needs that may arise. However, as we have discussed - it is not solely their job. It is the job of the entire church body to care for the widows and to serve the church in many ways. I would recommend that you also ask them how you can serve in different ways at CrossPointe as well!
Yet, not only does the church have the responsibility to ensure the care of widows, we see that the family has the first responsibility for such care. Which brings us to our next point…
Scripture References: Deuteronomy 10:18 ,Deuteronomy 24:17, Acts 9:36-43, Mark 12:40
III. The Church Must Command Families to Contribute (4, 7-8, 16)
III. The Church Must Command Families to Contribute (4, 7-8, 16)
But if a widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents, for this is pleasing in the sight of God.
Raising children is hard work - anyone here want to amen that? God sees that it is hard work as well! And He actually commands children and grandchildren to show godliness by stepping up and caring for their aging parents and grandparents.
Paul actually tells them to give some return to their parents and that doing so is pleasing to God.
I remember when my children were young really starting to have a lot more appreciation for my parents. Anyone else here feel that way as well? Mother’s Day and Father’s Day became a bit more special as I began to understand just how hard my parents worked to raise me. Frankly, how hard they worked just to keep me alive! Just feeding me probably just about broke the bank!
God cares much about this because it shows honor to your parents which fulfills the 5th commandment as seen in Exodus 20:12.
Paul continues with this teaching if we skip ahead a couple of verses…
Command these things as well, so that they may be without reproach. But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Here is that word command again. This stresses the importance of this duty of the family of widows. It will bring reproach on both the family and on the church if those in the family are not cared for - including widows as well as other family members.
Verse 8 is one of my favorite verses for today’s culture. Obviously, the context here is talking about caring for widows first and foremost - however this verse pans out and teaches the care of others in the household as well.
This verse is directed toward the head of the house - which if present, is the man of the house. I know that statement is controversial already in our culture, but the Scriptures are clear that husbands are to lead their families. Consider 1 Corinthians 11:3:
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
There are many other Scriptures teaching the sacrificial leadership that the head of the household needs to uphold.
But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
However, here in verse 8 we see that the husband is to care for his family - at least the members of his household first and foremost but his other relatives if able. I am about to offend the feminists and the passive males in our society all at once here in my next statement. Don’t shoot the messenger. I am just literally applying what God just said in His Word.
Husbands - it is solely your responsibility to care for your family financially. Before hammering this nail - understand that there are some caveats such as men who are disabled and other rare circumstances - these are the exception and not the rule.
However, God is clear that it is not the wife who is charged with providing financially for the home. It is the husband. You are charged with providing for the needs of the home. This doesn’t mean that you have to provide for every want! But you are responsible to provide for the needs of the home.
This might sound insensitive, but if you cannot provide for the needs of the home with one job - it is on you to get a second. Your wife is not called to bear the burden of providing. Whether she works some here and there or not is up to you all to discuss - that is a talk for another day. But she should not feel the burden of providing for the needs of the home.
To hammer this point even further, Paul ends with a harsh statement. He, in essence, states that even the pagans do that. Even the pagan husbands provide for their homes and their families.
If you claim to be a believer and do not do the good that even the pagans do, you are worse than the pagans!
Ouch!
If I might humble myself before you all for a moment - I had this Scripture preached to me when I was a newly married husband in my first and second years in medical school. We were financially strapped and my wife was doing some subbing in the school system and then eventually took on a full time teaching job at a local Christian school. She wanted to start a family, and her heart was to be at home with the kids. But I was working 80 hrs a week in medical school and couldn’t take on a job. On top of that, we had many people in our lives encouraging her to work while I was in school. It was the ‘right’ thing and the ‘fair’ thing to do they asserted.
I am so thankful to the Lord that I had a pastor who knew the Word well in this area and had a passion for Biblical marriage. My pastor at the time read this verse to me and told me it wasn’t her responsibility to provide for our family - even in this case. I tried arguing about the fact that I would have to take out student loans and that God doesn’t like debt either (I think I even had some good Proverbs to quote which I thought would help my case)! But when he dropped the whole ‘worse than an unbeliever’ line on me, I had no leg to stand on! He said I would just have to work extra hard when I was finished training to pay it all off!
I am here to tell you, friends, that our marriage flourished so much once I took the lead in this area. God’s ways work ya’ll. I’m happy to report that my student loans are in fact paid off and can celebrate God’s faithfulness to His Word.
After beating up the guys, there is a charge to the ladies as well, though. Look forward to verse 16:
If any believing woman has relatives who are widows, let her care for them. Let the church not be burdened, so that it may care for those who are truly widows.
There is nothing more beautiful than seeing a godly daughter or granddaughter or other relative care for an ailing widow. This is a picture of the Gospel. And Paul asserts that this relieves the church in order to care for those who really need the care and do not have others who can help.
If you are caring for an aging widow, know that God is greatly pleased. I know that this can difficult at times - but keep working in His strength. God sees your work and will reward those who are faithful in eternity.
Scripture References: Exodus 20:12, 1 Corinthians 11:3, Genesis 2:18, Ephesians 5:23
IV. The Church Must Charge the Wayward to Contrition (11-15)
IV. The Church Must Charge the Wayward to Contrition (11-15)
But refuse to enroll younger widows, for when their passions draw them away from Christ, they desire to marry and so incur condemnation for having abandoned their former faith. Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.
The heart of this part of the passage is that Paul wants to make sure that the church is investing in those widows who are truly needy. He doesn’t want to allow people to take advantage of the church. He wants to make sure they are deserving and in need.
He also doesn’t want to condone sin with the gifts of the church. The Bible is clear what happens when one becomes idle.
The Proverbs 31 woman is an example against this idleness as seen in Proverbs 31:27
She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
The writer of Proverbs has a harsh warning for those who are idle in Proverbs 18:9:
Whoever is slack in his work is a brother to him who destroys.
In essence, Satan is the greatest destroyer and those who are idle are allies with him.
Paul’s warnings here about gossip, idleness, and busybodies need to be taken seriously. Nothing can drive a church family apart faster than gossip and busybodies. Each of us must be sure that our goal in sharing prayer requests or any other information is for the good of another and not to bring harm or reproach upon them. Too quickly, prayer chains can become a gossip hotline. We should only share what is necessary for the prayer request and nothing further. Our main concern should be to protect the integrity of those involved in the prayer request and to avoid any slander or gossip.
So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander. For some have already strayed after Satan.
It appears that some of these younger widows had abandoned the faith as we saw back in verse 11 and now we are told in verse 15 that some have strayed after Satan. We are not told what all they have done as they have strayed after Satan. But it is clear that the church in Ephesus had a big problem with some of the younger widows abandoning their former faith and pledge. We know that their desire to remarry is not sinful as we see Paul encourage them to do so in verse 14. So in context, it appears that verse 11 referred to women who were remarrying unbelievers and abandoning the faith they once confessed.
So Paul’s encouragement here is for these young widows to marry believing husbands and manage their homes well. This would give them protection, a sense of purpose, and would glorify God.
Note, that this Scripture does not command every young widow to re-marry. But it does warn them of the dangers of not remaining in Christ.
The church must charge wayward believers to repent - in essence to contrition - to be broken-hearted regarding their sin. We know that true believers will persevere as we mention time and time again. And so we should approach those in sin in humility and in the power of the Word of God. Those who do not respond to this charge, may sadly show themselves to have never been true believers.
Scripture References: Proverbs 31:27, Proverbs 18:9, 2 Corinthians 9:11
Conclusion
As we come to a close, we have seen how the church should care for the flock. We have seen how we should communicate with charity with one another. We have seen how the church and the family should care for widows, and we have seen how the church should graciously confront those in sin.
God is concerned about how we care for the flock. He is the Good Shepherd. May we follow the Good Shepherd and selflessly love those among us.
As we have a time of prayer and reflection today, I want you to consider widows in your life. Consider those in our church or related to the church first and foremost. But don’t just stop there. Consider others in your community. How can you serve them? How can you pray for them? How can you show them the love of Christ.
We have been given the greatest gift ever - we have been given salvation through Jesus Christ - the sinless Son of God - Who died on the cross and rose three days later and now is at the right hand of the Father. In light of this wonderful truth, may we share the love Christ with others through our service for the Lord.
God blesses us that we can bless others. Listen to Paul in 2 Corinthians 9:11:
You will be enriched in every way to be generous in every way, which through us will produce thanksgiving to God.
You have been given your finances, your time, and your energy not just for you to enjoy. It is also so that you can be generous to others which glorifies Christ.