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Truths for Fathers

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DR. Christopher Peterson in Psychology today - What good are fathers
He did separate searches for scientific studies on mothers and then fathers. He found 97,957 studies on mothers and 35,236 studies on fathers, an almost 3 to 1 discrepancy. Similar discrepancies occur if we compare the number of Mother's Day cards and gifts sent each year to the number of Father's Day cards and gifts sent each year*. And the number of phone calls to Mom on her day versus Dad on his day is similarly out of balance**. The highest volume of phone calls made every year in the US is on Mother's Day. Interestingly - the largest volume of collect calls made every year in the US is on Father's Day.
With Father's Day approaching, I just did separate searches for the terms "mother OR mothers OR maternal" and for the terms "father OR fathers OR paternal." I found what I expected: 97,957 studies on mothers and 35,236 studies on fathers, an almost 3 to 1 discrepancy. Similar discrepancies occur if we compare the number of Mother's Day cards and gifts sent each year to the number of Father's Day cards and gifts sent each year*. And the number of phone calls to Mom on her day versus Dad on his day is similarly out of balance**.
Actively-involved fathers have close and affectionate relationships with their children; they spend time with their children; they talk to them about things that matter; and they are the kind of person their children want to be as adults
But most fathers are good ones, and research suggests that good fathers are those who are actively involved in the lives of their children. Active involvement is a deliberately general term, reflecting the point that there is no one way to be a good father.
Active involvement is often defined in terms of (a) engagement (directly interacting); (b) accessibility (being available); and (c) responsibility (providing resources). Actively-involved fathers have close and affectionate relationships with their children; they spend time with their children; they talk to them about things that matter; and they are the kind of person their children want to be as adults
Active involvement is often defined in terms of (a) engagement (directly interacting); (b) accessibility (being available); and (c) responsibility (providing resources). Actively-involved fathers have close and affectionate relationships with their children; they spend time with their children; they talk to them about things that matter; and they are the kind of person their children want to be as adults
By the time a man begins to realize that his father may have been right, he usually has a son of his own that thinks he is wrong. - Charles Wadsworth
Dad and Grandpa Hood
Sometimes dads don’t realize the impact they have. Good and bad.
In the Effective Father, Gordon MacDonald writes: It is said of Boswell, the famous biographer of Samuel Johnson, that he often referred to a special day in his childhood when his father took him fishing. The day was fixed in his mind, and he often reflected upon many things his father had taught him in the course of their fishing experience together. After having heard of that particular excursion so often, it occurred to someone much later to check the journal that Boswell’s father kept and determine what had been said about the fishing trip from the parental perspective. Turning to that date, the reader found only one sentence entered: “Gone fishing today with my son; a day wasted.”
Certainly there are absent dads. Abusive dads. Neglectful and lazy dads.
Dr Peterson also is quoted “But most fathers are good ones, and research suggests that good fathers are those who are actively involved in the lives of their children. Active involvement is a deliberately general term, reflecting the point that there is no one way to be a good father. Active involvement is often defined in terms of (a) engagement (directly interacting); (b) accessibility (being available); and (c) responsibility (providing resources).
Active involvement is often defined in terms of (a) engagement (directly interacting); (b) accessibility (being available); and (c) responsibility (providing resources).
The video ended by saying “we believe you have what it takes to change the world, and your doing it one relationship at a time”
If you are a believer, you have what it takes to change the world through your kids
Psalm 25:12 AMP
Who is the man who reverently fears and worships the Lord? Him shall He teach in the way that he should choose.
Psalm
Being a good father requires God’s grace - His forgiveness and His equiping with power
Being a good father requires God’s grace - His forgiveness and His equiping with power
Set a Christlike example, but don’t be self righteous. Demonstrate forgiveness
I sat in my dad’s living room reading one night while he watched television. An hour passed before I realized it, and I felt bad for not speaking during that time. I asked if he was OK, and he said yes. Then I apologized for not talking more. “Carmen,” Dad replied. “Talking is like ketchup. If you like the meat enough, you don’t need the ketchup—and if you like the company enough, you don’t need the conversation.” My dad never earned a college degree, but he was the smartest person I ever knew.
“My father didn’t tell me how to live life; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” – Clarence Budington Kelland
Set a Christlike example, but don’t be self righteous. Demonstrate forgiveness
“My father didn’t tell me how to life; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” – Clarence Budington Kelland
Deuteronomy 5:16 NKJV
‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
Not just an OT principle, but also in the NT
Ephesians 6:2–3 NKJV
“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
What does it mean to “honor your father”?
What does it mean to “honor your father”?
Honor is a sign of deference. Respect or esteem due and elder.
Parents teach children learn to respect authority beginning at home
Parents teach children learn to respect authority beginning at home Greek - to attribute high status to someone
Greek - to attribute high status to someone
How we honor our parents will reflect on how we honor others and even God
Romans 13:1–2 NKJV
Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves.
Their actions may not deserve it, but their office or position is due it
Their actions may not deserve it, but their office or position is due it
President
Remember that we are all different people, and we show affection and respect in our own individual way
“TALKING IS LIKE KETCHUP” by Carmen Mariano, Braintree, Massachusetts - I sat in my dad’s living room reading one night while he watched television. An hour passed before I realized it, and I felt bad for not speaking during that time. I asked if he was OK, and he said yes. Then I apologized for not talking more. “Carmen,” Dad replied. “Talking is like ketchup. If you like the meat enough, you don’t need the ketchup—and if you like the company enough, you don’t need the conversation.” My dad never earned a college degree, but he was the smartest person I ever knew.
I sat in my dad’s living room reading one night while he watched television. An hour passed before I realized it, and I felt bad for not speaking during that time. I asked if he was OK, and he said yes. Then I apologized for not talking more. “Carmen,” Dad replied. “Talking is like ketchup. If you like the meat enough, you don’t need the ketchup—and if you like the company enough, you don’t need the conversation.” My dad never earned a college degree, but he was the smartest person I ever knew.
James 4:14 NKJV
whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.
James 4:
Spend time with your family - you only get a limited amount
Mend relationships as much as it depends upon you
Use your limited time to prepare youth for the road ahead
Encyclopedia of 7700 Illustrations 2922 Epigram on Love for Parents

A judge who had a great number of cases involving families and homes once said: “We adults spend far too much time preparing the path for our youth and far too little time preparing our youth for the path.”

J Edgar Hoover - A judge who had a great number of cases involving families and homes once said: “We adults spend far too much time preparing the path for our youth and far to little time preparing our youth for the path.”
Teach them discipline
Father to teenage son: “No, you can’t use the car—but please feel free to use the lawnmower.” – Vern McLellan
Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. - Prov 22:6
Find your strength and peace in God
Don’t live your life vicariously through your kids
Demonstrate love (eros, phileo, & agape)
“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” – Theodore Hesburgh
Your words have power
Your words have power
Fathers build the self esteem of their children, esp daughters
Video showing son spilling milk, father seeing the apprehension and then spilling his
“...The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much”
Pray for your spouse, children, child’s future spouse, grandchildren.
If you don’t who will?
I cleaned out Dad’s closet yesterday. There were two things I couldn’t box up: his work shirts and his two pairs of Red Wing boots. He couldn’t remember birthdays or anniversaries, but he remembered the date on which he’d bought his first pair. I remember it too—April 16, the day after Tax Day. What does a child do with her dad’s favorite boots? I think I will make a planter out of them or use them to store something valuable. You can’t throw away a man’s favorite boots. You’ve got to keep them and pass them down.
“TALKING IS LIKE KETCHUP” by Carmen Mariano, Braintree, Massachusetts
I sat in my dad’s living room reading one night while he watched television. An hour passed before I realized it, and I felt bad for not speaking during that time. I asked if he was OK, and he said yes. Then I apologized for not talking more. “Carmen,” Dad replied. “Talking is like ketchup. If you like the meat enough, you don’t need the ketchup—and if you like the company enough, you don’t need the conversation.” My dad never earned a college degree, but he was the smartest person I ever knew.
By the time a man begins to realize that his father may have been right, he usually has a son of his own that thinks he is wrong. - Charles Wadsworth
Deuteronomy 5:16 NKJV
‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
Not just an OT principle, but also in the NT
Ephesians 6:2–3 NKJV
“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
What does it mean to “honor your father”?
Honor is a sign of deference. Respect or esteem due and elder.
Parents teach children learn to respect authority beginning at home
Greek - to attribute high status to someone
How we honor our parents will reflect on how we honor others and even God
Romans 13:1–2 NKJV
Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves.
“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” – Theodore Hesburgh
Their actions may not deserve it, but their office or position is due it
President
Remember that we are all different people, and we show affection and respect in our own individual way
“TALKING IS LIKE KETCHUP” by Carmen Mariano, Braintree, Massachusetts - I sat in my dad’s living room reading one night while he watched television. An hour passed before I realized it, and I felt bad for not speaking during that time. I asked if he was OK, and he said yes. Then I apologized for not talking more. “Carmen,” Dad replied. “Talking is like ketchup. If you like the meat enough, you don’t need the ketchup—and if you like the company enough, you don’t need the conversation.” My dad never earned a college degree, but he was the smartest person I ever knew.
God is the ultimate Father and wants to heal us
Read “The Heart of a Father”
My father always told me, “Find a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” – Jim Fox
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