Engineer

Comprehending Engineers

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!"

The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greenskeeper. Let's have a word with him."

"Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"

The greenskeeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters.  They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."

The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."

The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."

The engineer said, "I don’t see why these guys can’t play at night?"

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"

The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"

The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"

The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates.  St. Peter checks his dossier and says,  "Ah, you're an engineer -- you're in the wrong place."

So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in.  Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell, and starts designing and building improvements.  After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. 

One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer,  "So, how's it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies,  "Hey, things are going great.  We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What???  You've got an engineer?  That's a mistake—he should never have gotten down there; send him up here!"

Satan says,  "No way.  I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God says,  "Send him back up here or I'll sue."  

Satan laughs uproariously and answers,  "Yeah, right.  And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"