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The preacher’s wife was trying to use up the last little bit of a stubborn bottle of ketchup when the doorbell rang.  She sent her 5 year old to answer the door.  It was the president of the women’s group at the church.  “Is your mother home? she asked.  “Yeah,” he answered.  “She’s in the kitchen hitting the bottle.”

Journal of Religious Speaking, Med. Blue book with small bird in circle, page 51