Two Bagels to Go

 
It was a terrible night, blowing cold and rain in a most frightful manner. The streets were deserted, and the local baker was just about to close up shop when a little man slipped through the door. He carried an umbrella, blown inside out, and he was bundled in two sweaters and a thick coat. But even so, he still looked wet and bedraggled.

As he unwound his scarf, he said to the baker, "May I have two bagels to go, please?"

The baker said in astonishment, "Two bagels? Nothing more?"

"That's right," answered the little man. "One for me and one for Bernice."

"Bernice is your wife?" asked the baker.

"What do you think?" snapped the little man. "My mother would never send me out on a night like this!"