Christian home: Parenthood
Notes
Transcript
Handout
Handout
Christian Home Essentials
Christian Home Essentials
What a series we have been in thus far regarding essentials within a Christian home.
Marriage Institution created by God
A husband and wife to be joined in “Holy” Matrimony
Each has their God given duties within the marriage
Husbands duties
Husbands love your wives
Husbands respect your wives
Husbands support your wives
Wives duties
Wives submit to their husbands
Wives love their husbands
Wives manage the home
This evening we will take one more step back and broaden the scope from the marriage and duties within marriage to now parenthood. God’s purpose for marriage included and was commanded even to have children (see Gen1:28)
(be fruitful and multiply picture inserted here)
(below not on the screen but read it)
28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
(Transition) every part of the Christian home has duties, responsibilities and now we are going to look at duties within parenthood. Duties of Fathers, and the duties of mothers.
Question: what do you think the duties of a Father and a Mother are within a Christian family?
Duties of Fathers
Duties of Fathers
In a world where absentee fathers continue to increase it is an alarming trend, but the scripture gives some clear duties to have a Christian home with fathers present and to prevent absentee fatherhood.
(Fatherless statistics picture inserted here)
more facts in 2010 24.7 million children (33%) were living without a father. It is stated that this is a largest social issue in the USA at that time.
More facts: 57.6% of blacks households, 31.2% of Hispanic households and 20.7% of White households according to the US Census bureau
Suicide: 63 percent of youth suicides
Runaways: 90 percent of all homeless and runaway youths
Behavioral Disorders: 85 percent of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders
High School Dropouts: 71 percent of all high school dropouts
Juvenile Detention Rates: 70 percent of juveniles in state-operated institutions
Substance Abuse: 75 percent of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers
Are you shocked? Are you dismayed, discouraged, maybe heartbroken? God has given us instructions on how to have the essentials needed for a Christian home and how to replicate (teach to others). These are just statistics and we can be a part of helping to change those numbers!
(Transition) so now to the bible instructions for duties of a father.
Provide life’s necessities (2Cor12:14; 1Tim5:8)
14 Here for this third time I am ready to come to you, and I will not be a burden to you; for I do not seek what is yours, but you; for children are not responsible to save up for their parents, but parents for their children.
Parents (in our case and point now) is to save up (provide for) their children (2Cor12:14) d
So parents are to provide for their children, now remember that in the Christian home the duty of the husband is to provide for the wife, now that rolls right on over to providing for the children.
There is the warning Paul gives to Timothy.
8 But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
By not providing you are denying the faith and is worse than an unbeliever (1Tim5:8)
For even the unbeliever, the evil will provide for their own.
Provoke not to wrath (Eph6:4; Col3:21)
This admonition to not provoke to wrath is given twice by Paul and let’s look at it for a moment.
4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Do not provoke wrath, but bring up in training and admonition of the Lord (Eph6:4)
21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Do not provoke, so they not become discouraged (Col3:21)
Albert Barnes, theologian who wrote many commentaries in the 1800’s said this.
“By unreasonable commands; by needless severity; by the manifestation of anger”
He also stated “lest by your continually finding fault with them, they should lose all courage, and despair of ever pleasing you.”
(Transition) so, providing necessities, to not provoking, now may we move on to training?
Provide spiritual training (Eph6:4; Deut6:6-7, 32:46; Ps78:4-6; Jos24:14-15)
As a reminder let me put this verse back up before you
4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Question: What does Eph6:4 say to do regarding “bringing up?”
6 “These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. 7 “You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.
Words, instruction, commanded to be on your heart (Deu6:6)
Instruction by teaching them diligently to your children (Deu6:7)
46 he said to them, “Take to your heart all the words with which I am warning you today, which you shall command your sons to observe carefully, even all the words of this law.
Take the instructions to your heart, it is warning, and a command (Deu32:46)
And need to give you another passage
4 We will not conceal them from their children, But tell to the generation to come the praises of the Lord, And His strength and His wondrous works that He has done. 5 For He established a testimony in Jacob And appointed a law in Israel, Which He commanded our fathers That they should teach them to their children,
6 That the generation to come might know, even the children yet to be born, That they may arise and tell them to their children,
Teach it to the next generation so they might come to know and they can tell their children (Ps78:6)
so in short, the word must be in the fathers heart first. Then the father can lead his family, like exampled by Joshua in Jos24:14-15. “as for me and my house we will follow the Lord”
Training by example (an excerpt from Discipleship journal) -
When the father is an active believer there is about a 75% likelihood that the children will also become active believers. But if only the other is a believer, this likelihood is drastically reduced to 15.
(Transition) - so far we have the Christian father should provided for the physical necessities, provoke not into anger/wrath/discouragement; and provide spiritual training (especially by example). Now one more for the duty of Christian father before moving on to mother.
Provide loving discipline (Heb12:6-10; Pro13:24)
Our heavenly father disciplines his children as it says.
6 For those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, And He scourges every son whom He receives.” 7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?
8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?
10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness.
Question: What is the reason for the heavenly discipline (Heb12:6)?
(love!)
Question: What in the intended result of the discipline (Heb12:10)?
(share in His holiness)
One more passage to consider Fathers
24 He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
Discipline diligently, consistently and done in love so as to share in the holiness of God. - now moving on
Duties of Christian Mother
Duties of Christian Mother
May we remember that the wife is to manage the home, and that includes caring for the children, the duty of a Christian other is vital.
A statistic by American Anthropological Association states that over 200 women kill their children in the United States each year. That is a shocking number, filicide (that is what it is called) is bigger in the USA than any other country. It is more likely to happen in homes that the mother came from a broken home or an abusive home.
Duty: Love your children (Tit2:4)
4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,
but then I need to keep in context
1 But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine. 2 Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance.
3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,
Teach, encourage mothers to love their children (Tit2:4)
By example of older women, younger woman can be encouraged and taught how to love their children.
Manage your household (Tit2:5; 1Tim5:14; Pro31:10-31)
5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
Speaking of a woman, who is to be a sensible, pure, worker at home, all the while being kind (Tit2:5)
Even younger widows are told to marry, have children according to 1Tim5:14
Another good quote to share this one from Richard Kerr from article in Homemade.
The most creative job in the world involves fashion, decorating, recreation, education, transportation, psychology, romance, cuisine, literature, art, economics, government, pediatrics geriatrics, entertainment, maintenance, purchasing, law, religion, energy and management. Anyone who can handle all those has to be someone special. She is. She’s a homemaker and a mom.
Provide spiritual training (Act16:1-3; 2Tim1:5)
(Mother only household statistics slide inserted here)
Shocking isn’t it? in a society that has so many absentee fathers the mother has to step into the spiritual training of the children. They are more than capable to do such look at this example.
1 Paul came also to Derbe and to Lystra. And a disciple was there, named Timothy, the son of a Jewish woman who was a believer, but his father was a Greek,
We see Timothy, not necessarily without a father in looking at this verse, but look who did the spiritual training.
2 and he was well spoken of by the brethren who were in Lystra and Iconium. 3 Paul wanted this man to go with him; and he took him and circumcised him because of the Jews who were in those parts, for they all knew that his father was a Greek.
Oh, wait we have the results of the training but not who did the training yet, but have to ask a question.
Question: As a result of the spiritual training of Timothy how was Timothy spoken of (Act16:2)?
Now onto the his spiritual trainers
5 For I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well.
Question: Who are the spiritual trainers of Timothy (2Tim1:5)?
Question: Can you give me another result of the training? - sincere faith!
Too often, fathers neglect the spiritual training, leaving the others to do it, or to pick up the slack.
Christian home and parenthood, it’s serious business and we as a family consisting of Fathers, mothers, fathers in training as well as mothers, surrounded by grandparents (older men, women) to help by history, by example to help each other in parenthood.
(Second greatest blessing picture inserted here)
Blessed are the homes in which
Fathers fulfill their duties as Christian men, who accept responsibility for their families.
Mothers fulfill their duties as Christian women, knowing and living out Pro31:10-31- being a virtuous woman!
No perfect home, no perfect parents for we know we all fall short, But God! Yep, God gives us grace gives us mercy so we can do the same with our spouse and our children
We have an awesome responsibility as parents and grandparents in a Christian home to teach, guide, lead by example so the Children can grow and go, go serve the Lord because of the training they got at home.
(Transition) In a short snippet written by Tim Smith in book called “the relaxed parent” gave seven ways to impact your child’s faith.
Model a growing personal faith (If they don’t see it, they won’t catch it).
Include faith in normal conversations.
Be authentic
Serve together
Pray for your children; and with them too.
Learn and communicate love in their language.
(Encouragement slide - Christian parenting in God’s hands)
Christian parenting starts with being a Christian, followed by being a husband, a wife, then fulfilling the command of Gen1:28 with the instructions given throughout the bible. Put your parenting, or grand-parenting into the hands of God since He gave you the awesome job and responsibility of being a parent or a grandparent!
(Prayer) (Exit)