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IN 1986, DURING A ROUTINE SWEEP OF CENTRAL PARK, NYPD OFFICER STEVEN MCDONALD WAS SHOT IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD THREE TIMES BY A 15-YEAR-OLD KID
BECAUSE OF THAT MOMENTARY ACT OF VIOLENCE, STEVEN SPENT 31 YEARS CONFINED TO A WHEELCHAIR AS A QUADRIPLEGIC. HE:
· He had not held his wife in three decades
· He never played catch with his son. who was born just a few months after the shooting
HIS TOUR OF DUTY ENDED ON JANUARY 10TH, 2017 AS HE
HE HAD ALL THE RIGHT IN THE WORLD TO BE BITTER, BUT STEVEN HAS FORGIVEN THE YOUNG MAN WHO SHOT HIM
BUT NOT EVERYONE HURT AND INJURED, WITH THEIR LIVES DESTROYED, CAN FORGIVE LIKE STEVEN – many live their lives walking around with a bitterness that destroys them and everyone in their pathway of life
LEAD INTO SCRIPTURE: I am not talking about unbelievers but those who profess Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior
READ: Hebrews 12:14-15 (KJV) 14 Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: 15 Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;
BITTERNESS IS DESTRUCTIVE ON ALL LEVELS AND STEPHEN KNEW THIS
WE HAVE ALL BEEN WRONGED AND WE HAVE ALL BEEN BITTER FOR A WHILE TOWARDS A PERSON – but many hold on to that bitterness until it destroys them
MOSES WARNED THE ISRAELITE'S NOT TO GROW BITTER AND TURN AWAY FROM GOD – and it is a warning to us as well
Deuteronomy 29:18 (KJV) Lest there should be among you man, or woman, or family, or tribe, whose heart turneth away this day from the LORD our God, to go and serve the gods of these nations; lest there should be among you a root that beareth gall and wormwood;
AS BELIEVERS, WE MUST BE CAREFUL NOT TO ALLOW BITTERNESS TO OVERCOME US. HEBREWS 12:15 TELLS US:
Hebrews 12:15 (KJV) Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;
****At first bitterness is hidden; but when it is discovered and it comes forth, its poisonous roots have spread, and it springs up as something much bigger and more destructive****
BITTERNESS USUALLY MEANS HAVING OR BEING A TASTE THAT IS SHARP, HARSH AND UNPLEASANT - It has come to refer to an extremely negative emotion, one that a person has from mistreatment by circumstances or people
A “ROOT OF BITTERNESS "COMES WHEN WE:
· Allow disappointment to grow into resentment
· Nurse grudges in our heart over past hurts
Acrid (caustic)bitterness inevitably seeps into the lives of people who harbor grudges and suppress anger, and bitterness is always a poison. It keeps your pain alive instead of letting you deal with it and get beyond it. Bitterness sentences you to relive the hurt over and over.
Lee Strobel
BITTERNESS IS DESTRUCTIVE ON ALL LEVELS AND WILL:
1) DICTATE OUR EMOTIONS
THE HEART IS THE SEAT OF ALL OUR EMOTIONS AND A HEART FILLED WITH BITTERNESS CAN FEEL NOTHING – it becomes cold and callous and goes against all we stand for and believe in
Galatians 5:17 (KJV) For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
BITTERNESS BLINDS OUR HEARTS TO FRUITS OF THE SPIRIT
Galatians 5:22 (KJV) But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
AND REPLACES THEM WITH THE POISON DARTS OF SATAN SUCH AS:
· Jealousy
· Hate
· Immorality
towards those who have wronged us
THE ROOT OF BITTERNESS WILL AFFECT ALL OTHER EMOTIONS AND WILL CONTROL OUR:
· THOUGHTS— it will consume all that we think of and will rule in our minds
Acts 8:22-23 (KJV) 22 Repent therefore of this thy wickedness, and pray God, if perhaps the thought of thine heart may be forgiven thee. 23 For I perceive that thou art in the gall of bitterness, and in the bond of iniquity.
· TONGUE — bitterness will shoot out when we speak, just like a Cobra spews venom at the eyes of its victim
James 3:8-11 (KJV) 8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. 9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. 10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. 11 Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?
STEPHEN REFUSED TO ALLOW BITTERNESS TO REMAIN IN HIS HEART AND RULE HIS EMOTIONS – And we should too
HE CHOSE FORGIVENESS AND LOVE, THE GREATEST EMOTION, TO RULE OVER HIS HEART
John 13:34-35 (KJV) 34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
“I forgave him because I believe the only thing worse than receiving a bullet in my spine would have been to nurture revenge in my heart "Such an attitude would have extended my injury to my soul, hurting my wife, son and others even more.....1 have come to realize that anger is a wasted emotion "
Do you choose forgiveness and love or bitterness?
****Be careful - Bitterness blinds those who refuse to deal with it****
BITTERNESS IS DESTRUCTIVE ON ALL LEVELS AND WILL:
2) DETERMINE OUR ACTIONS
A HEART AND SOUL FULL OF BITTERNESS WILL CAUSE BELIEVERS TO DO THINGS THAT DO NOT GLORIFY GOD
OUR ACTIONS CAUSED BY BITTERNESS CAN AND WILL DESTROY OUR:
· FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS – Spouse and family members receive the brunt of your bitterness
· PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS – everyone in your path becomes a target
· SPIRITUAL LIFE – a Godly testimony will be replaced by a hardened view of God
SAUL WAS A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF THIS WHEN IT WAS REVEALED TO HIM THAT THE KINGDOM OF ISRAEL WOULD BE TAKEN FROM HIM AND GIVEN TO DAVID, SAUL WAS FILLED WITH A BITTER SPIRIT
1 Samuel 18:7-12
SAUL’S APPRECIATION FOR DAVID TURNED TO JEALOUSY AS PEOPLE BEGAN TO APPLAUD DAVID'S EXPLOITS - In a jealous rage, Saul attempted to murder David by hurling his spear at him
****Saul knew that the power of God had been taken away from him and placed upon David’s shoulders, thus bitterness and jealousy toward David consumed his emotions and his actions****
SAUL WAS BITTER AT DAVID BECAUSE GOD WAS PUNISHING HIM – something that we must be incredibly careful of
ANGER IS A DANGER SIGNAL THAT A BELIEVER HAS ALLOWED BITTERNESS TO TAKE ROOT
Matthew 5:22 (KJV) 22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.
****Anger in this case refers to a seething, brooding bitterness against someone****
ANGER IS A BITTERNESS DRIVEN EMOTION THAT ALWAYS THREATENS TO LEAP OUT OF CONTROL, LEADING TO VIOLENCE, EMOTIONAL, AND SPIRITUAL DAMAGE - Anger keeps us from developing a spirit pleasing to God
STEPHEN’S ACTIONS WERE LED BY LOVE NOT BITTERNESS - he had no desire to destroy that young man’s life but wanted him to know what love and forgiveness looked like
Leviticus 19:18 (KJV) 18 Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.
THE GREATEST WAY TO HEAL A HURT IS WITH LOVE NOT BITTERNESS
Matthew 5:43-44 (KJV) 43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. 44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
UNRESOLVED HATRED CAN BECOME AN ALL-CONSUMING OBSESSION - Hatred and bitterness are like weeds with long roots that grow in the heart and corrupt all of life and will determine our actions
****Be careful - Bitterness blinds those who refuse to deal with it****
BITTERNESS IS DESTRUCTIVE ON ALL LEVELS AND WILL
3) DESTROY OUR RELATIONSHIPS
LIKE A SMALL ROOT THAT GROWS INTO A GREAT TREE, BITTERNESS SPRINGS UP IN OUR HEART AND OVERSHADOWS EVEN OUR DEEPEST CHRISTIAN RELATIONSHIPS
BITTERNESS WILL DESTROY OUR DEAREST AND DEEPEST RELATIONSHIPS – without us even realizing it
BITTERNESS DESTROYS BY BRINGING INTO OUR RELATIONSHIPS:
· Jealousy
· Discord
· Hatred
SATAN HAS USED BITTERNESS TO DESTROY CHRISTIAN RELATIONSHIPS THROUGHOUT THE CENTURIES. IT HAS CAUSED:
· Wars
· Divorces
· Church splits
BITTERNESS HAS DESTROYED THE LIVES AND MINISTRIES OF MANY MEN AND WOMEN SINCE THE BEGINNING OF THE CHURCH AGE – and they have never recovered what God had blessed them with
BUT THE RELATIONSHIP THAT WILL BE DESTROYED THE MOST IS OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD – BITTERNESS places a wedge between God and ourselves
WHEN THAT HAPPENS, OUR LIVES THEN BECOME A TRAIN WRECK – our EMOTIONS and our ACTIONS all go against everything that God stands for and forbids in the lives of His Children
MANY BELIEVERS HAVE GROWN BITTER WITH GOD BECAUSE THEY CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHY HE ALLOWS SUCH HARMFUL THINGS TO COME INTO THEIR LIVES – they blame Him for the mistreatment that they have received
Why Me God, Why Me?
THEY REMAIN BITTER AND WOULD RATHER DESTROY THAN FORGIVE, WALK IN HATRED INSTEAD OF LOVE, BE MISERABLE INSTEAD OF REPENTING – they place all the blame upon the shoulders of the one who hurt or offended them
STEVEN KNEW THAT IF HE REFUSED TO FORGIVE HIS SHOOTER, HIS HEART WOULD BE FULL OF RAGE AND BITTERNESS AND THAT HE WOULD DESTROY HIS RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE TWO PEOPLE CLOSEST TO HIM — his wife and son
BITTERNESS CAN AND WILL DESTROY RELATIONSHIPS IF IT IS NOT DEALT WITH - Steven dealt with his by viewing the situation from God’s standpoint
How are you going to handle your bitterness against others?
Are you going to allow it to ruin a relationship that is dear to you?
****Be careful - Bitterness blinds those who refuse to deal with it****
I HAVE THREE QUESTIONS FOR YOU IN CLOSING:
Are you bitter towards someone because of the emotional, mental, or physical harm that they may have caused you in the past?
Are you bitter towards God for situations that are in your life and has it affected your relationship with Him?
If so, are you willing to deal with it right now at the altar, so that like Steven you can go on with your life in a true and loving relationship with God and with those who have harmed you?
WE CAN DEAL WITH BITTERNESS OF HEART IN THREE WAYS:
1) REPENT OF OUR OWN ACTIONS TOWARDS THE OFFENDER – covering up our sin of unforgiveness only feeds the bitterness
Ephesians 4:31-32 (KJV) 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
2) FORGIVE THE OFFENDER – after all Christ forgave us, should not we forgive them
Matthew 6:14: KJV: For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
3) LOVE THE OFFENDER AS CHRIST LOVED YOU – He loved you and died for you and I believe we should love them like He loved us
Ephesians 5:1-2 (KJV) And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.