Ephesians 5:3-5 - turn around edit file
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This sermon really flows out of the last three. A few weeks back we surfaced the idea that when God saved us from our sins, He created us after His own likeness. He gave us a true righteousness and a true holiness. We who were once sinners are now saints. We are the holy ones of God. By His mercy and sacrifice, we are in right standing with Him. This is our reality and because it is our reality, we need to make every effort to put off all our old ways, and live out our new reality in a functional way. We need to be functionally righteous.
Over the last few weeks, Paul has laid out a laundry list of areas in our lives that need to be rearranged to make our lives more functional or fitting with this new reality. Paul says, some things are going to have to be changed around a bit.
Things like: we need to tell the truth and control our anger.
We must stop stealing and work with our hands to make an honest living so that we can share with others the wealth that God has given us.
Our functional righteousness changes our speech patterns because we have been changed at the heart level.
We must be people who are marked with kindness and we must be tenderhearted, and willing to forgiving others.
We make every effort to not grieve the Holy Spirit of God who initiated us into this new reality and who indwells us and empowers us to functionally live it out.
We are God imitators. Wow!
Today we get one final admonition from Paul as to how we are to live out our functional righteousness and it will bring to the surface what many of us have pushed down for so long in hopes that our dark secrets may never see the light of day. Today we will see that our functional righteousness must demonstrate its power as we demonstrate control over our sex drives.
Would you say that you have consistent control over your sex drive?
Those formerly known for their sexual impurity, must now be sexually pure. (v 3-5)
Those formerly known for their sexual impurity, must now be sexually pure. (v 3-5)
3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.
4 Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.
5 For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
First of all notice that Paul is writing these words to “saints.”
3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.
These words are written to those who have been “born again.” To be born again means that a death has taken place. We have died to an old way of life and we who have died to that old way of life, now have the ability to live according to the new way of life that has been opened up to us. Paul is writing these word to the “holy ones” of God and not to the world in general. Paul was not trying to reform the world, He was trying to reform Christians from the world. And he is decisive in this.
He is going to be very strong here and basically say, not only are there things not to be practiced, but there shouldn’t even be a hint of them among us. Paul is going to say, “these things shouldn’t even be named among us.” They aren’t proper or fitting for us. They are incongruent with our new life. For followers of Christ the words (immorality, impurity, covetousness/greed, filthiness, foolish talk, and crude joking) are synonomous with the definition of the word antonym.
By “antonym” I am referring to the Greek origins of the word which are two words, “anti” = against and “numa” name - these ways of thinking are “against our name.” These things are not named among us.
There is no trace of them. No trace of them in our internet history. No trace of them in our relationships with members outside of our spouse. Forensic linguist could find any shred of improper speech. No forensic scientist could find a trail of breadcrumbs leading back to a time when feasted at the house of lady folly who is loud, seductive and inviting as she announces...
17 “Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.”
But we, followers of Christ have come to discern and prefer our Saviors voice over hers. For us, there are pleasures flowing at God’s right hand and we have come to realize in one way or another…that we can’t scoop burning hot coal into our lap and not be burned.
We have an aversion to these things. They are like the Grinch to us…these are things that we wouldn’t touch with a 39 1/2 foot pole.
I just described for you the ideal and the biblical norm, however…not many of us have this as our experience and we must grow past these things.
Let’s just go through and look at these terms and then notice the final appeal of Paul to put these things to death in our lives.
There should be...
No trace of any sexual immorality, impurity or covetousness.
No trace of any sexual immorality, impurity or covetousness.
Ephesians 5:3 (ESV)
3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.
The word for sexual immorality is the Greek word: Porneia. It is kind of a catch all term for any kind of illicit sexual activity.
Now the world would say…what do you mean by illicit and who determines what is illicit? We live in a world that is morally compromised. God’s adversary, the one who masquerades as an angel of light, has done a tremendous job on pulling to wool over the eyes of his followers, which by way of reminder was all of us at some point in time. There is a worldview out there that is simply not based in God’s reality.
For instance there is an obvious, observable and objective truth in God’s creation that sex is binary…it is how we were created. That is how we are even able to obey God’s command to be “fruitful and multiply.” How are Adam and Eve to be fruitful without “male and female” parts? But there is a false narrative of reality that says… “No…we live in a world where people can choose their own preferred pronouns.”
How have you noticed the world rapidly changing in regards to sexual perversion?
I don’t know if you have noticed this but things are changing rapidly in culture. Immorality is rampant and it is heartbreaking. It is not our job necessarily to change culture, but we must be people who do not have the culture influence us.
I hate to use that term…because it sets up and “us” verses “them” mindset but we must be distinct and different…that is why Paul says to the Corinthians...
17 Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you,
and that is why he says to the Colossians...
8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.
Look everything is straight when you have no “moral compass.” Paul says that the world as a whole has “exchanged the truth of God for a lie” and they have gone way off course.
And to the Ephesians, Paul prohibits “any” sexual immorality and impurity.” Anything outside of the marriage bed is to be considered off course for us.
Any thought or action with anyone or anything outside of your spouse is off course. Well I don’t have a spouse…the same still applies. It’s off course!
Let’s take porn for example. Think about how fleeting and off course this is.
How many of you after watching porn think to yourself. Man I am so glad I watched that? That brought lasting satisfaction…I will never have to view that again. No…that is not how it works…there is an unquenchable desire for more. There might not be a more complete perversion of God’s good gift of sex, than pleasuring yourself with porn.
I don’t want to sound like crotchety old grouch, stick in the mud type of guy, but if Paul were here today I think he would want us to consider what sitcoms we watch and laugh at. I think he would have us consider the lyrical content of the music we listen to. I think he would want us to consider whether or not it is wise for us to have unfiltered internet access or “old flames or old friends” on facebook. I think he would say to us…do you make a regular practice of discerning what comes into your eyes?
If Jesus were here He would say, “You know the eye is the lamp of body.”
If Solomon were here he would say,
20 My son, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings. 21 Let them not escape from your sight; keep them within your heart. 22 For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all their flesh. 23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
Our sexual self indulgence is an abomination. And our struggle isn’t just skin deep…it goes deep into our very being. Jesus was famous and controversial for saying phrases like, “You have heard it said, but I say to you…fill in the blank.”
On the surface that seems pretty bold…but when you consider the fact that He is the Maker of all life…I think He has the street cred to pull that phraseology off…and what is interesting is that He takes “immorality” to a whole new level. He goes much deeper by saying, “If you look at a woman with lust you have committed adultery.” Whoa…that is a whole new take.
In a sense He says, things done in the mind are just as bad as things done in the body. The body never does what has never entered the mind. If you body does something, it does it because you have made a decision in your “mind” (inner person) to do so. That at that point your physical brain takes over and sends signals to your body parts to look, listen, touch, taste or to smell. That is the way we work. Our insides are connected to the outsides.
How is sexual sin more than just a physical act?
Sexual immorality isn’t just the physical act. The heart of the matter is, it’s a matter of the heart. People end up doing what they want to do because they desire it. We need to be changed at the core.
I think that is why Paul is lead by the Spirit to go on and say what he says next,
3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.
“all impurity.” When we read the word “impurity” we should think of something defiled or unclean. The OT is replete with instructions on how to handle those who were “unclean” or “impure.” For instance in the OT leprosy was a very visible disease. According to Levitical law…those who were pronounced unclean had to...live alone outside the camp, wear torn clothes, keep his or her hair disheveled, cover his or her upper lip, and cry out “unclean, unclean.” (and we thought covid restrictions were bad!)
In order to be considered clean, the person must go to a priest and engage in an official cleansing ceremony that included a cleaning of clothes, a shaving of hair, and a ritual cleansing. Additionally, at least one lamb—if the person was too poor for multiple lambs, birds could be used as a substitution—and flour and oil must be given as an offering. All for a disease that is skin deep.
But we are diseased at the heart level. We have leprosy of the heart. We were and some of you in this room still are in need of a deeper cleansing from a better priest who can exchange his pure spotless robes for your filthy garments. You need a cleansing that can only come from a priest whose beard was plucked for you instead of him shaving your head. You were, or still are, so filthy that you don’t need to go to a priest to offer a sacrifice too him, you need a priest that will offer Himself as a sacrifice for you.
You needed and still are in need of Jesus the Christ.
And He commands that we abstain from all impurity…we must kill that which used to kill us. We must refrain from every impurity.
And Paul goes on to say, “or covetousness.” meaning “greed.”
Greed is an excessive desire for more of something. It is thinking that you are in need of something, but it is being withheld from you.
Greed is an excessive desire for more of something. What do you tend to covet most often?
What does Paul put forward as the antidote for greed?
What do we ultimately have as our lasting and abiding possession that we are to be grateful for?
Greed is unbridled in our our society. Just look at the abundance of renovation and remodeling shows. Listen to what the potential homeowners say, “I need granite countertops.” I need more space and an open floor concept for the two times a year some our kids come home for holidays.”
Greed is excessive in our society but in the immediate context Paul is linking covetousness with sexual immorality and impurity. Our culture is so wrapped up in “sexual freedom.” The only thing shameful in our society is to say that there are things that are “shameful.” Sexual expression has risen to godlike status, and so many are making sacrifices of worship at the altar of sexual desires. But the sad thing is…is it is not satisfying. They are hungry for more.
I want to put a pin in this thought and ask a question now, but answer it later. What is the antidote to greed? We will come back to this but right now...let’s move onto the next verse where we will see that there should be...
No trace of Filthy, Foolish or Vulgar Talk
No trace of Filthy, Foolish or Vulgar Talk
4 Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.
We won’t take much time on this, because I think it should be obvious especially if we can remember back a few verses where Paul told us not to let “corrupting / rotten” talk come out of our mouths.
No filthiness - Nothing that is obscene, vile or disgusting. Nothing shameful, foul or polluted. Not even a hint. Do you ever mindlessly or mindfully sing along to popular music? Would you describe the lyrical content as clean and descent? Pure and chase? Moral and unpolluted? No filthiness.
What filth are you allowing into your mind by watching your top 5 sitcoms or reality television shows?
No foolish talk. Empty thoughtless chatter. I think maybe there has never been an easier time to engage in foolish talk than with the rise of social media. True, foolish talk might not be on our lips, but it is coming out of our fingertips for all of our friends and the whole world to see. If you want to let your light shine, change the way you talk and type…and be that lamp on the stand that Jesus talked about that can give light to the whole house. Refuse to engage in foolish talk.
How are you tempted to engage in foolish talk? What do you most often post about online?
No crude joking. No innuendo’s, No making light of God’s precious gift of being able to be fruitful and multiply. This type of talk is “out of place” for followers of Christ.
Well what am I going to watch, listen to, or laugh at? You just potentially eliminated pop music, sitcoms and social media. You just cancelled all the worlds culture for me. No I didn’t…Paul did!
Well what am I going to do instead because I still am coveting more of what the world has to offer?
Let’s take that pin out and talk about the antidote for greed.
In this verse Paul say replace all that “out of place bad stuff" with thankfulness.
This is a weird connection? Seemingly? Paul you just told us to abstain from all of this stuff that if the truth be told we have desires to participate in. How can I be thankful for what I am not supposed to participate in?
Exactly. You just answered your question with your question. You should be thankful that you don’t have to participate in and attempt to find meaning and expression in any “sinful pleasure” because they are “fleeting and never satisfying.”
Well what am I to be satisfied with? What can be more satisfying than sexual expression and fulfillment? What can possibly be more satisfying than fitting in with my peers? What can be more gratifying than getting “likes” or “shares” on my social media rant post? What am I going to boast in and be thankful for?
Paul says,
14 But far be it from me to boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world.
The world is dead to me. The world and all it assigns values are dead to me. The most important thing to me is not that I am sexual fulfilled or entertained. The most important thing to me is not that I am well liked by my peers or that I am up to date with the latest garbage the world has to offer. The most important thing to me…the thing that I am thankful for, the thing that I am boasting in is that i have been crucified to the world. It is dead to me and I to the world. I have a whole new identity that has been given to me when I was placed “in Christ.” And at God’s right hand there are pleasures flowing forevermore.
Think about the this stunning truth. In Luke 10 Jesus sends out 72 people with a message and with power. They preach the Good News and they even cast out demons. They come back to Jesus and are joy filled to have demonstrated such power over the evil spiritual forces in the world. Jesus celebrates with them, but then centers them on the most important thing when He says,
20 Nevertheless, do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”
Jesus says, Your ultimate identity is not in who you used to be or what you used to take pleasure in or how much power you have…your ultimate identity is in Whose you are not who you are and you are Mine and your name is written in My book.
The pinnacle moment of human existence is not the pursuit of sexual happiness. The apex of human existence is walking in the good works that were prepared for us in advance to walk in.
This whole section is talking about putting off our old self and putting on our new self created after God’s own image in true righteousness and holiness. We must replace our old greedy selves to with the new contented thankful self.
Aristotle once hypothesize that “Nature abhors a vacuum.” Meaning unfilled space goes against the laws of physics and nature. It’s true of human existence as well. If you abstain from certain patterns of thinking, speaking and behaving you must replace it with something else.
That’s why Paul tells the Philippians...
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
Blogger Tim Challies muses on what it look like to disobey him in this command. If we turn the passage around we are promised the opposite.
“Finally, brothers, whatever is false, whatever is immoral, whatever is prejudiced, whatever is filthy, whatever is base, whatever is reprehensible, if there is any inferiority, if there is anything worthy of censure, think about these things.
What you have learned and received and heard and seen on television—practice these things, and the God of peace will be distant from you.”
If divine peace flows toward those who discipline their minds to fixate on all that is lovely and pleasing to God, divine peace flows away from those who allow their minds to fixate on all that is unlovely and on all that is displeasing to God.
My brothers this should not be...
Finally, Paul wraps up this section with an urgent warning. What he says next answers the question why we should care about any of this stuff.
We might be in despair thinking, this seems too hard. I am in too deep. I tried and failed to many times before. Why should I try again? To you Paul says...
5 For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
Any weakness in any area of your life, because of the Gospel, is an opportunity for you to worship the one who can actually empower you to overcome any temptation that is common to man. Because you are born again and created after God’s own likeness you have an inheritance in the Kingdom of Christ and God and THAT reality should be something that is more desirable than ANY DESIRE that rises up in your body. If it isn’t, than maybe you don’t have an inheritance.
Now I know that this sermon is not extremely practical. Give me the four easy steps man! How can I make advancement in my battle for purity?
The answer to that question is not by listening to a sermon. The solution to that is more nuanced and best addressed in sacred confines of a one on one discipleship ministry. Speaking of which, we have people in place here to walk alongside you to find solutions to the problems you face. We can unfold a battle plan for you, but you have to expose your darkness.
13 Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
Many of us need help today…and thankfully help is here. I need help…you need help. We all need help. Yes we do. So let’s run to Him together.
Who are you going to approach to expose your darkness and find help and assistance in your battle for purity? Will you call that person right now?
Those formerly known for their sexual impurity, must now be sexually pure. (v 3-5)
Those formerly known for their sexual impurity, must now be sexually pure. (v 3-5)