Curious

It was over 16 years ago, now, that I went through a process that was much like this. I’ve told you about being in ministry for a couple of years, then running from it because I just didn’t think I could do it and I really didn’t want to do it. I left the full-time ministry and even though I was serving God as layman, I just couldn’t be satisfied. O, I enjoyed my life very much, don’t get me wrong, but there was just something missing that I could not put my finger on. There was this hunger in me that was not satisfied and a sense that I really wasn’t pleasing God with my life. I think He had been calling me really for many years. I claimed He hadn’t, but there was a part of me that, even subconsciously, knew he had.

Finally in the summer or fall of 1992, I couldn’t run anymore. It got to the point that, whenever I had my quiet time, there was this consciousness that something wasn’t right and, more and more I knew there was a question needed to ask, but wasn’t willing to. Finally, the pressure got so great that I asked the question I had been avoiding. I began to ask, “God, are you calling me to the ministry?” You see, I became curious. And you know, the more I asked the question the more I began to suspect that the answer was yes. Finally, the question became a commitment. I said, “God, if you are calling me into the ministry, I will obey. If a church calls me, I promise that I will go if you open the door.”

You know, the most amazing thing is that, from the time I had been in pharmaceuticals beginning in 1989 until the fall of 1992, I had received no calls from churches about the possibility of coming as a minister of music. As soon, however, as I surrendered to it, I began to get calls, and that is how I ended up here.