Sermon Tone Analysis
Overall tone of the sermon
This automated analysis scores the text on the likely presence of emotional, language, and social tones. There are no right or wrong scores; this is just an indication of tones readers or listeners may pick up from the text.
A score of 0.5 or higher indicates the tone is likely present.
Emotion Tone
Anger
0.14UNLIKELY
Disgust
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Fear
0.15UNLIKELY
Joy
0.52LIKELY
Sadness
0.54LIKELY
Language Tone
Analytical
0.56LIKELY
Confident
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Tentative
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Social Tone
Openness
0.33UNLIKELY
Conscientiousness
0.22UNLIKELY
Extraversion
0.59LIKELY
Agreeableness
0.98LIKELY
Emotional Range
0.44UNLIKELY
Tone of specific sentences
Tones
Emotion
Language
Social Tendencies
Anger
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> .9
CHURCH HUMOR
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage.
He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
*****
An elderly woman died last month.
Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers.
In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."
*****
A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?"
He said, "Call for backup."
*****
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.
A small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby-sitter."
*****
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
*****
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings.
Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side.
I think I'm going to have a wife."
*****
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil.
One said to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?"
The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out.
It's probably just your dad."
*****
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!
Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!"
As she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress.
She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again.
As she ran she once again began to pray, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...
But please don't shove me either!"
< .5
.5 - .6
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> .9