Sermon Tone Analysis
Overall tone of the sermon
This automated analysis scores the text on the likely presence of emotional, language, and social tones. There are no right or wrong scores; this is just an indication of tones readers or listeners may pick up from the text.
A score of 0.5 or higher indicates the tone is likely present.
Emotion Tone
Anger
0.13UNLIKELY
Disgust
0.11UNLIKELY
Fear
0.11UNLIKELY
Joy
0.54LIKELY
Sadness
0.56LIKELY
Language Tone
Analytical
0.64LIKELY
Confident
0UNLIKELY
Tentative
0.35UNLIKELY
Social Tone
Openness
0.56LIKELY
Conscientiousness
0.74LIKELY
Extraversion
0.56LIKELY
Agreeableness
0.64LIKELY
Emotional Range
0.83LIKELY
Tone of specific sentences
Tones
Emotion
Language
Social Tendencies
Anger
< .5
.5 - .6
.6 - .7
.7 - .8
.8 - .9
> .9
There is the story of a preacher who got up one Sunday and announced
to his congregation: I have good news and bad news.
The good news is, we
have enough money to pay for our new building program.
The bad news is, it's still in your pockets.
-------------------------------------------------
While driving their car in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.
The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... Energy efficient vehicle.
Runs on oats and grass.
Caution: Do not step in exhaust.
-------------------------------------------------
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question "Boys and
girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air.
"He is an
artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really?
How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
--------------------------------------------------------
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before
a long holiday weekend.
The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead
of the minister in front of the service station.
Finally, the attendant
motioned him toward a vacant pump."Reverend," said the young man, sorry about the delay.
It
seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean.
It's the same in my business."
----------------------
People want the front of the bus, back of the church and center of attention.
------
Somebody once figured out that we have 35 million laws trying to enforce 10
commandments.
-----------------------------
Somebody has well said that there are only two kinds of people in the world.
There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord,"
and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."
----
A minister parked his car in a "no parking" zone in a large city because he was short
of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.
So he put a note under the windshield
wiper that read: I have circled the block 10 times.
If I don't park here, I'll miss my
appointment.
FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES.
When he returned, he found a
citation from a police officer along with this note: I've circled this block for 10 years.
If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job.
LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION.
------
A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly, "I know what Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what Bible
means?"
The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father.
"So, Son, what does
Bible mean?" ³That's easy, Daddy.
It stands for Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.
------------------------------
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who matter don't mind, and those who mind don't matter."
< .5
.5 - .6
.6 - .7
.7 - .8
.8 - .9
> .9