Sermon Tone Analysis

Ephesians 5:22–24 (KJV 1900)

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

This means not only that she is to submit to him in the same way she does to the Lord but that her submission to her husband is part of her submission to the Lord.

Grant R. Osborne

The woman, as a result of the curse, seeks to rule and not submit.

She wants control.

That is the fallen woman’s tendency.

And God commands again in the New Testament

You can add to that the terrible assault that Satan makes on the outside.

And we are reminded that before we ever get out of the book of Genesis, marriage has been assaulted formidably from the outside.

In 4 of Genesis is polygamy.

In 9, pornography is born.

In 16, adultery.

In 19, homosexuality.

In 34, fornication and unequal marriages.

In 38, incest.

In 38 also the first prostitute is mentioned.

And in chapter 39 the first specific case of seduction.

The general spirit of all relationships should be submission.

The Matter of Submission:

Ephesians 5:22 (KJV 1900)

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

She is to follow willingly the leadership, the headship of her husband.

This and this alone can minimize the curse and reverse the conflict.

Submit to what you possess.

“Your own husband”.

Colossians 3:18 (KJV 1900)

18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

This is fitting, this is appropriate, this is proper, this is right before the Lord.

It is not a cultural preference, it is a spiritual command.

“Fitting,” by the way, is a word that has significance.

For example, in the little letter to Philemon and verse 8 it refers to something that is legally binding.

“in the Lord” - The limits of submission.

Limit of Submission

There is a limit, by the way, to what is fitting in this role of submission.

It does not mean that a woman submits to her own husband in that which dishonors God.

You remember, don’t you, in Acts how the apostles said when commanded not to preach, we must obey God and not men.

If that comes to that, you have to choose to obey God.

I think of Vashti in the book of Esther, the first wife of the king.

The king came to her and asked her to dance a lewd dance before a drunken crowd and she refused and rightly so, rightly so.

But in the created order and in the proper design of God, it is legally binding by the commandment of the Almighty Himself that a wife be in submission to her husband.

It is fitting, Paul says, before the Lord.

His leadership is given by God and she is to recognize that and in a humble spirit of loving submission come under that leadership.

And again I remind you that this should be easy to do, it should be very appropriate, well understood, except for the curse, except for our sinfulness and except for the onslaught that Satan has brought against marriage to confuse these issues.

1 Peter 2:13 (KJV 1900)

13 Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme;

1 Peter 2:18 (KJV 1900)

18 Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward.

1 Peter 2:21 (KJV 1900)

21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps:

In other words, Christ suffered undeserved punishment, He suffered it without retaliation, without reviling back, He uttered no threats.

He just turned Himself over to God, took His suffering and in the end it had a profoundly significant result.

It redeemed souls out of the human race.

1 Peter 2:25 (KJV 1900)

25 For ye were as sheep going astray; but are now returned unto the Shepherd and Bishop of your souls.

What do you mean likewise?

“As someone under the authority of government, as an employee under the authority of an employer, whether the government is good, bad or indifferent, whether the employer is good and gentle or abusive and unreasonable, in the same manner that Jesus suffered unjustly and did nothing but commit Himself to God for God to bring out of that unjust suffering a glorious end, you wives be submissive to your own husbands.”

The implication here is that it really doesn’t matter what kind of husband he is.

You say, “Well, I have a husband who’s disobedient to the things of God, who’s indifferent to Jesus Christ, who’s abusive, who is not kind and loving, is not good and gentle.”

All the more reason, Peter says,

“In the same way you wives be submissive to your own husbands so even if any of them are disobedient to the Word they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.”

Line up under them, all the more reason if they are not saved, if they do not obey the Word of God, some are unsaved implied there but it could also imply a person who had made a profession of faith in Christ and was not obedient to the Scripture, “All the more reason to be submissive.”

And again I remind you, as is fitting and fitting has its limits.

You’re not to be submissive if he commands you to do directly that which opposes the Word of God or commands you not to do that which the Word of God does command you to do.

But apart from those things for which you are under the command of God, you must submit to your husband.

You have a husband who is a trial to you, either because he’s unsaved or he’s a disobedient believer, he fails to fulfill all of your hopes and expectations for what you would want as a husband.

He comes short for what you hope for and maybe what you thought he was.

And you are gravely disappointed.

You chafe under his authoritarianism.

He cares little for how you feel, it seems.

All the more reason to be submissive, all the more reason to demonstrate to him a meekness, a purity, a respectful kind of behavior, all the more reason not only to adorn the outside and please do that, we all appreciate it, but do more than that, more than putting on a pretty dress or wearing gold jewelry or doing your hair, adorn your heart with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit which is precious in the sight of God.

And I might say every man’s dream.

It doesn’t mean you have to kill your personality.

It doesn’t mean you have to become a robot.

It doesn’t mean you have to become boring.

It doesn’t mean you never give your opinion.

But there needs to be deep down in your heart gentleness, quietness, that hidden part is precious in the sight of God.

God prefers a woman like that.

And again, that same phrase “their own husbands,” not to all men … women collectively are not under the control of all men, a wife is under control of her husband.

That’s why I think it is a very serious situation when a woman goes to work and comes under the necessary control of other men … very confusing, very difficult for her.

Illustration of Submission:

1 Peter 3:6 (KJV 1900)

6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

John MacArthur Sermon Archive (God’s Pattern for Wives, Part 1)

As Abraham was the father of the faithful, Sarah is the mother of the submissive, she’s the prototype.

Abraham is the prototype of faith, she’s the prototype of submission.

No terror, the word is literally terror at the end of verse 6, great peace, great security.

Influence of Submission:

“Women shall be preserved, saved, delivered, any of those, through the bearing of children if they continue in faith and love and sanctity with self-restraint.”

Incredible verse.

Earlier in this passage, verse 9, “Women are to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not winding all their gold and pearls through their hair to show off their wealth and wearing costly garments.”

He’s talking here, by the way, about worship, 3:15, how they conduct themselves in the church.

So he’s saying when you come to worship, you don’t get yourself all dolled up like you were going to a wedding or something.

But you’re going to adorn yourself when you come to worship, you do so by means of good works as is fitting to women, making a claim to godliness.

And then it says, “Let a woman quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness.”

Well there it is again, the whole idea of the submissiveness of a woman.

She comes, she hears the instruction with entire submissiveness.

Verse 12, “I don’t allow a woman to teach or exercise authority over a man but to remain quiet.”